The Comedy Fox
by Lvmj
Summary: Don't let the title fool you. This story is about a boy who's lost his grin at four. He grows not trusting anyone without a Mask, besides the Old Man. Yet, when he is forced into a deal that could help him, would he go with it or give up his dream?
1. How it all started

**Lvmj: "Friend got me back into writing as how my hands are better right now. Might know her from the other Naruto story on my account, "Seeing the World Blindfolded", so decided to try out a Naruto one. Forwarning, foul language ahead.**

**DarkLvmj: "Oooooh! A new one!"**

**Lvmj: "Speak of the devil....still haven't come up with another name eh?"**

**DarkLvmj: "Nope!" cackles.**

**Lvmj: Sighs. "Anyway, help with the disclaimer."**

**Both: "We don't own THIS!"**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter One: _How it all started_

_They think I can take the pain? The ridicule? The God-damned stares of hate and pity?! I can't! For the first time in my measly_ _four years of this pathetic life, I am giving up! I cannot stand it! I just want to die, to wither away in this lonely alley corner, away from the bastards that beat me. Not that anyone would care to find my corpse.....wait.....I think I'm wrong on that part._

_Maybe the old man with the funny clothes and the nice people at that ramen shop will give me a proper burial? They are the only ones who openly nice to me, not counting those guys in Masks. They may have been nice to me but saving me, but they are as dull as a brick, especially that white haired guy._

_Speak of the devil, he's right hear kneeling beside me. I can't really move nor hear him....wonder what he's saying. _

_Two more Masked people come and knelt down beside him. They brought a stretcher of some kind....kinda hard when to make it out when you got all this damn blood over my eyes. White hair seemed to be frantic about something. _

"It's okay Naruto, we are getting you to the hospital," _I finally heard White hair speak. I guess my freakish healing kicking in. Why can't it just stop and let me die?_

"Come on, help me lift him up Neko," _White hair says as the lady Mask help me up on the stretcher. So that other Mask is called Neko? Strange name for a Mask. _

_Scenes change as I drifted in and out of consciousness. A forest, buildings, doorways, and finally a white ceiling. _

_Konoha Hospital, my second home, literally. I scanned my room, it being actually my own private room every time I come here, to see the old man sitting down at a desk in the corner. He usually does this, defeating his so called enemy, paperwork, while waiting for me to wake up. It just bugs me on how they got the desk in here this time, I am not usually up and awake when they bring in the damn thing. _

"Ah, Naruto-kun, you're awake!"_ the old man said as he suddenly appeared beside me. It always shocks me on how he can move so fast when he's all pushing seventy.....how old is he anyways?_

"Neh, old man, how old are you?" _was my question to him. His face, priceless! The amused yet dumfounded look he gave me will be etched into my memories forever._

"Old enough to know that that's not a questioned to be answered now," _was his answer. _

_Tch, old bastard, dodging the question._

"Anyway, when can I get out of here?"_ and when can I get out of this damn casts! First time I noticed them when trying to get up. They must have done a number on me since I usually wake up good as new._

"Not for a while Naruto." _The old man pulled up a chair and sat down beside me. _"Naruto, how would you like to become strong?"

_Strong? Enough to beat back all the assholes that have wronged me? Where the hell can I sign up for that!_

"You got a deal old man!" _I said in a light tone, but I couldn't give him the usual grin. All the things that have happen.....I can't seem to get over it. He seems to have noticed it as well._

"Naruto, are you alright? I would assume you are happy about this," _the old man said. Damn he catches things quickly, doesn't he?_

"I am, but I can't seem to smile," _I said gravely. It seems the bastards of this village have robbed me yet of another thing. It shouldn't even be hard to smile! Just lift up the muscles in your face and freaking smile!_

_Instead I frown even further. A withered old man was placed on my head, ruffling the golden locks on it, breaking my thoughts on my smile._

_Looking at the old man beside me, he seemed to have aged right before my eyes. His own eyes seemed too sparkled with unwept tears, his frown hung down so low I thought it would fall off. _

"Naruto....you will make a great shinobi. Starting tomorrow, you will be trained by me, the strongest ninja of this village, the Hokage." _That literally had my eyes bugging out. The old man?! No, MY old man the strongest ninja in Konoha?_

_Damn! He's freaking awesome!_

"So....am I suppose to call you Hokage-sama or something?" _He chuckled and I tried to smile, failing. _

"No, my boy, no. I fear it wouldn't feel right you calling me anything else besides 'Old Man'."

_I nodded in agreement. I don't think I could ever 'formaly' respect him in words, but he knows as I do that he holds the greatest respect that I could give him. _

_And thus, our training started for six years......._

_Which leads to my current problem. I stand before Hokage-jiji, delt in an ANBU fashion that Kakashi-White Hair helped me pick out. _

_A black longsleeved shirt with ANBU red armor covering instead of their usual white ones. The sword on my back was dealt in duel ones, as I never truly felt comfortable with just one._

_And as every ANBU have, I have a Mask placed on me. It's very different one from the rests of my colleagues. It has been described to me as a "Comedy Mask", popular for Comedy and Horror theatre I have seen off outside my home._

_My hair had calmed down a bit from spiking up when I was younger. It still hade spikes, unnatural really, but most of it flopped down over the head of my mask and past my ears. _

_Ah, but I digress. My problem with the Old Man._

"What the fuck you mean I got to go to the Academy!?" _Yup, you heard right. Hokage-jiji better have a damn well reason for this. _

"Our Country, the Land of Fire's, Feudal Lord has decreed that you are two go through Academy for training,"_ he grimaced. Damn right he better grimace! What the hell does that bastard Lord of ours think I have been doing for years?!_

"What the hell is that about!?"_ I scowled beneath my mask._

"I know, Naruto-kun. But it's not that kind of training, it's for psychological healing you go through Academy with peers of your own and graduate with them....shit."

_He cursed when he felt my 'killer-intent' sweep over the area. I mildly notice the ANBU come in before immediately go back out when they notice it was me. They are smart enough not to get on my bad side. _

"GRADUATE WITH THOSE .....THOSE.....GAKIS?! What the fuck! I am going to kill him!"

"Now hold on Naruto, you have to do this. Didn't you always want my job?" _Hokage-jiji said, diminishing my anger in an instant._

_How the hell does he do that? Must be a Hokage thing._

_Speaking of that, I always wanted to be Hokage, to fix up the flaws I see in the Konoha system and make sure no one is ever cruel to an....unfortunate soul._

"Fine," _I breathed out, defeated._

"Good," _Jiji chuckled at me before growing serious, which makes me stand up tall, well straight, I am rather short. _"ANBU Comedy Fox, you are to report to Academy room 12 of Umino Iruka first thing in the morning."

_I only had one thing to say._

"I fucking hate this."

_Okay, maybe four things to say._

**Lvmj: "Comments?"**


	2. Just getting started

**Lvmj: "Thought I update sooner. This is just an information gathering chapter before the Academy. It's to shine some light on Naruto's past, sort of, and what friends he has in certain places."**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Two: _Just getting started_

"I really fucking hate this," _I said, my words very similar back at Hokage-Jiji's office._

_My Old Man had tried to get me to not wear my ANBU armor and clothing. The key word is "try" people. Let me just make one thing very clear....._

_THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL I AM WALKING IN KONOHA ARMORLESS!_

_So he agreed after my short outburst and called someone to replace his glass in his office......maybe I shouldn't have shouted loud?_

_Nah..._

_Next he tried to get my Mask. My pride and joy! I freaking bled for this Mask! Ate with it on! Wear it 24/7! I even fucking sleep in it! _

_Which is a bitch in the morning when trying to clean the drool out. So when it came to my Mask being removed, I did the only thing that came to mind._

_Run like hell._

_Hokage-Jiji must have been caught off guard by my sudden burst out of the room, tearing off the door and jetting down the halls and out a window to escape, because it took five full seconds before he was on my ass._

_He's not the Hokage and the strongest shinobi in Konoha for nothing! Although I had youth on my side, he had experience and I was soon captured and tied, much to my embarrassment. _

_Think about it. An ANBU kid being hauled through town by the Hokage. He was freaking dragging me on the ground for fuck's sake! Embarrassing as hell!_

_Though in the end, I managed to plead with him, AKA help him with his paper work for a month, and I got to keep my Mask, barely, though I had to wear a shirt over my ANBU clothing to hide them along with my tattered cloak, it's been though many missions and I just don't have the heart to part with it....for now._

_Even though I have all this clothing on, I am a little famous being Comedy Fox, so my Mask is a dead give a way to the gakis. Oh well, maybe some might not know about me. _

_So, here I am, right in front of the Academy. I was nervous, for once, and let my hand sway to my kunai pouch on my leg._

"Maa, nervous Naruto?"_ Shit! My immediate reaction was to toss my kunai at the voice._

_Kakashi White Hair was behind me, my kunai firmly in the log he switched places with as he read his.....book. I shuddered at that accursed book, remembering how old White Hair made me sit through it, via an earth jutsu with me neck deep in the ground, and hear him giggle like a mad school girl._

"I am glad I thought to bring a log with me. That would have been a pain to remove, Naruto-kun," _Kakashi said, giving me one of his patent eye smiles._

_Kakashi White Hair was my ANBU captain when I joined. He's one of the many Masks that I trust in ANBU. He was also one of the three, Woody and Purple were the other ones, who stayed up all night with me when I heard I have this....'thing' in my gut. At least I know why I was beaten every day of my life._

_Least to say I was immensely sad to hear he was quitting, it wasn't going to be the same seeing him without a Mask._

_Imagine my surprise when finally seeing him without the Mask and seeing him have a smaller Mask on and one eye._

_I was filled in later by how Kakashi was called "The Copy Ninja". _

"Neh, White Hair, what are you doing here?"_ I enjoyed the act of him face planting from my question._

_He quickly popped back up._

"What? Can't I visit an old friend and student?" _I gave him the silent stare of Comedy Fox, which seemed to work as he sighed and closed hit book._

_Wait, did he just close his book? This must be important._

"Officially, I am just making sure you go to school. Unofficially, I don't really want to serve another Hokage when I have such a good friendship with a future one."

_That....well, no words could describe my immense joy that old White Hair has my back with me being Hokage someday. Although I believe all the Masks in ANBU believe in me, it's nice to hear it from someone. _

_It was then I noticed families coming towards the Academy. I tend to get to destinations a bit early when I'm nervous. _

_The families.....they all look happy with their kids. I felt a pang of depression, wondering if any of those parents are some of the people that use to...._

_My thoughts were broken when Kakashi White Hair put his hand on my shoulder._

"Go on Naruto. Just remember, you're not that alone in the world." _I gave him a stiff nod as he disappeared with a shunshine. _

_As they got closer, some of the kids gave me weird looks as their parents, some of them at least, gave my fearful gazes. Not because of the 'thing' I have, they don't know I am Uzumaki Naruto. It must be of my reputation as Comedy Fox._

_I quietly shook my head at them and entered the Academy, no longer feeling nervous. It was just about twenty minutes for classes to begin, so I found myself the only student in the classroom when I opened the door. _

"Oh, someone's here?" _a scarred Chunin said to me. This must be Umino Iruka._

"Hello Scar-san,"_ I said with a bow. Iruka gave me a curious gaze before smiling. He must have been forewarned about my nicknames I give to people._

"It's Scar-sensei to you student," _he said with a stern but humorous tone. I was already liking this guy._ "Though I am surprise, Naruto, that you don't recognize me."

_Wait a sec, I know him? You know, now that he brings it to my attention, he sounds like...._

"Dolphin?" _Iruka, no Dolphin, nodded with a smile. Dolphin was a former Mask that retired. I have been wondering where he has been. _"You know it's kind of hard to recognize you Scar-san without a Mask."

"I know, just means you need to work harder," _Iruka said, scolding me. This brings back some memories. It was him that taught me how to be...proper during certain times, which is hard as hell to do when you want to punch a stupid fucking client right in the face. _"Now, which name do you want to be known as, Naruto? Comedy Fox or Uzumaki Naruto?"

"Let's go with Comedy Fox for now, I don't trust these Gakis with my name....plus I want to see their reactions," _I said, trying to grin with the light tone in my voice, failing once more._

"Alright, Comedy Fox, take a seat anywhere you want," _Iruka said. He must have noticed the pitter patter of feet coming to the classroom. _

_I took a seat near the back, kicking my feet on the desk, putting my arms behind my head to rest it there, and waited for....class to start._

"This is going to fucking suck,"_ I said, wondering how I am going to make it here without going crazy._

_Oh well, at least Iruka's here. _

**Lvmj: "Comments? Guesses to what happens next?"**


	3. My Name? Two things?

**Lvmj: "Hope you all like this one. Hands are becoming a bothersome again, so I may ask DarkLvmj to write for me later on.....that is if she kindly does it?"**

**DarkLvmj: "OF COURSE!!! I love your writings!" Cackles with glee.**

**Lvmj: "Anyway, tell me what you think about this one."**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Three:_My Name? Two things?_

_Stares, stares, stares, and, oh did I mention it? More stares! What?! They haven't seen a Mask before! _

_The Gakis, once they set foot in the room, were immediately starting at me. I knew this was a bad idea, damn it Old Man!_

_I crossed my arms and turned my head towards the Gakis and gave off a tiny bit of killer intent, don't want them crapping themselves if I release too much, right?_

_Then again.....that would be a hell of a funny sight to see. But just before I was strayed to amp it up a bit, I noticed about eight other kids either not affected or holding their own against it. _

_Hmm, blond, blue eyes.....a Yamanaka? Not surprisingly really, most Yamanakas are strong willed with an equally stronger mind to intimidate. She appears to be decent.....though she could have some meat on her bones. The girl looks like if I threw a wind jutsu near her, she'd fly away in an instant! _

_Next one, let's see. Pink hair, green eyes, seems to think on different subjects judging by how her eyes switch to me and a dark headed boy. Oh shit, a Haruno. Luck of the draw for me I guess. They are okay, Harunos, in general, but they have a crazy blood limit thing that deals with an 'inner' personality. Not to self, get on her good side. Female Haruno punches are strong as hell!_

_Now, that boy the girls seem to be.....well, let's say 'drawn' to, since that's about the safest word besides, oh let's say....obsessed, longing, crazy as in "I wanna rape him!" crazy. _

_From the fan crest on his back and the scowl on his face, must be the last Uchiha. So, Sasuke's in Scar-sensei's class? From what I heard from the Old Man, Itachi did a real number on him before running off to God knows where. Always wondered why he killed every Uchiha besides Sasuke. Maybe he was as messed up in the head as me?_

_Enough about Sasuke, let's see....an Akimichi and a lazy Nara? Don't tell me they are starting the second generation of the Ino-Shika-Cho trio? Maybe I should look into them; they could be as interesting as their fathers......what the hell is in that boy's hood?_

_A small white dog popped out of it soon after I wondered that. So an Inuzuka? Must be from that wild look and 'domination' feel I get from him. He must want to be the 'head' of this 'pack' in this classroom. Hmm, maybe it's this Kiba Wolf seems to talk about every day. Guess it's her brother or something._

_Now, the only female not worshiping the ground Sasuke walks on....literally, I have seen at least two girls from before kissing the ground Sasuke stopped on to get groceries. It was a funny sight really.....only if it wasn't too fucking disturbing. _

_Anyway, it looks like a Hyuuga is in this year's class, though she doesn't appear to have something jagged shoved straight..... not going to finish that thought. From the way she has her head down, she's shy.....wait, a shy Hyuuga? That's rich! _

_A burst of laughter escapes my unsmiling mouth, not that anybody can see it, and practically scared a few gakis. _

_I cleared my throat. _"Excuse me," _I murmured, growing calm and cold as normal. I think a few kids need a change of....yeah, there goes a few civilian students. Wusses. _

_Feeling a presence coming my way, my eyes moved to the figure coming up the small stairs towards the back. Tall coat, sunglasses, and a buzzing sound around him. _

"Hello," _said the Aburame with a slight nod of his head. Not only did this guy have the balls to come up to me, he even greets me! One of the many reasons I like Aburame Masks. _"My name is Aburame Shino."_ Alright, he just got some of my respect. Shino, eh? _

"Comedy Fox,"_ I said, holding out a gloved hand to him. He appears shocked by this, not unreasonable since many people are scared of their Keki....keko...whatever the hell they call their bugs. Note to self, learn what they call their bugs before I make a bad comment in front of the main Bug-man. _

"A pleasure to meet you Fox-san," _Bug-man junior said to me, shaking my hand. _"If you don't mind me asking, why do you wear an ANBU mask?"

_By his words alone, I felt the whole class look towards me. I hate this attention, when is the damn bell for class going to begin? _

_Scar-sensei caught my silent plea as he commanded everyone to sit down. Bug-Man junior sat down an aisle in front of me and the rest were scattered around. _

"Welcome back to Konoha Academy students!" _Scar-sensei yelled in his 'commanding voice.' _"You know how I work things around here, but this year I will be receiving help from another teacher who should be arriving later on today." _From what I gather, it must be on the surplus of students here. It didn't occur to me that many of the heirs of clans around here were in here._ "You will be coursed in weaponry, tactics, jutsus, geography and, to a point, history, just like the years before. This time it will be harder. Targets will be farther away, they will be moving, anything just under non lethal moves is now allowed in spars, failing is not an option....damn it Shikamaru, wake up!" _Scar-sensei's speech, which I have no doubt he spent all night writing, was interrupted when the Nara snored, quite loudly I may add. _

"Sorry sensei, but," _cue loud yawn right here, _"I didn't get much sleep last night."

"You've been using that line for years now, you know?"_ Scar-sensei said with a dead-panned expression. It was funny to see somebody else give him a hard time. _"Anyways, we have several new students here. So line up and say your name proudly along with two things about you."

_The students sauntered out but I remained sitting. Scar-sensei gave me a quick glance and gave a hidden nod to me. I just hope that no one notices me up here. Now, just got to cast a low genjustsu over my body and...._

"Hey Iruka-sensei! Why doesn't Mask boy come down here?" _Fucking loud mouthed Inuzuka. Can't just respect my privacy, can ya? You are so Wolf's brother, and I agree with all the bad things she has said about you. _

"Sorry Comedy Fox, every student down here," _Iruka said to me. I noticed the subtle regret at calling me out. What can you do about it, eh?_

_So, with a heavy sigh, I stood up and calmly walked down the short stairs and with the gakis. As they got started, I just muted out every other kid that weren't the eight I took notice of. _

"My name is Aburame Shino. I like my kikaichu. That's all." _Ah, that's what they are called. Better write that down. Besides that, this_ _Guy is of few words I suppose, didn't even name a second thing about him._

"Akimichi," _chew,_ "Choji. I like food," _chew once more. He really likes food, especially those chips he has. _"And I hate people who use the 'f' word."

_Even I felt a little intimidated by the look Big Man gave us. Note to self, don't joke about their weight, although I hope my nick name for him works._

"Hi everyone, my name's Haruno Sakura! I like...."_ She blushed. I can't believe I was right about her liking Sasuke, ha! Bubblegum didn't seem to continue on as she got back in line, still red as hell._

"A-ano....my name is Hyuuga H-Hinata. I enjoy f-flower press-ssing and I like m-my l-little sister." _Shy and stutters. White Eyes sure has no courage what so ever, poor girl. _

"Hey everybody! My name is Inuzuka Kiba and this is Akamaru!" _Yup, definitely Wolf's brother. I think I'll use Wolf's nick name for him; Pup. _"We like meat and our territory!"

"So troublesome," _the Nara kid said, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. So lazy! _"Nara Shikamaru, sleep, and more sleep." _Lazy Bones got to be the most laziest Nara ever with that introduction. _

"Hey! Yamanaka Ino is my name!" _Boisterous one, isn't she? _"I like Sasuke-kun and my best friend Sakura!" _Uh oh, trouble with friendship? Sakura looks torn._

"Uchiha Sasuke," _.....are those hearts around him? Where the hell did this come from, genjustsu? No..... Freaking fan girls; must be their doing. _"I don't like anything." _Damn, he's anti-social. Wonder how Ducky is going to be like in a few years._

_Everything was silent now. Whose turn is it? I looked at the kids and saw them staring over at me. So I did the natural thing in that situation. _

_I looked the other way, wondering what they were looking at. I heard several thuds while I saw nothing to the side of me._

"Oh, it's my turn?" _I ask a bit sheepishly. Scar-sensei gave me a humorous nod as I sighed and went to stand in front._

"My name? Comedy Fox." _Some idiots give me confused looks as some, Bug-Man junior, gave me a nod. _"I have this thing about giving people I know nicknames, so please don't get upset," _I said with a shrug of uncaring. _"As for the last thing? I don't trust anyone without a Mask."

_Needless to say the first day was quickly becoming awkward. _

**Lvmj: "Well there you go. Wrote this after going to a concert. Aerosmith and ZZ Top were freaking awesome!" Clears throat. "Anyway, DarkLvmj will definetly help me write the next chapter, hands are near crippling state. Tell me what you think of the story so far."**


	4. Questions Girls Chair lodged into

**Lvmj: "Special thanks to Kyuuki-sama for giving me a nickname for Ino and DarkLvmj for helping me write this. Right hand is kind of crippled right now but did my best on this one."**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Four: _Questions + Girls = Chair lodged into Pup's head._

"What kind of introduction was that?" _I heard the Yamanaka say off to the far side. It was a 'get together and learn about each other' time and I still haven't got a nick name for her. It was driving me nuts! _

_After introducing myself, Scar-sensei told us to break off and talk, get to know each other a little bit. I just walked away and sat back down._

"I know. He's a strange one, that's for sure," _Bubblegum said to....Mind Walker! Ha! That's her name. Why didn't I think of that before? She's a freaking Yamanaka for fucks sake! I must really be slowing down in my years....and I'm only ten!_

"Troublesome, why don't you go talk to him and get the whole story?" _Curse you Lazy Bones! You and your fucking brain! _

"It appears Ino-san and Sakura-san are debating on coming over here." _Ah, that's right, Bug-Man junior had sat next to me. I get the feeling he didn't want to chat, instead to listen in on other conversations just like I am. Hmm, I should recommend him to ANBU in a few years. _

"Leave now Bug-Man junior if you want to escape them. Lord knows they won't stop," _I muttered to him, enjoying the slow raising of his eyebrows at my nickname for him._

"Good luck, Fox-san," _he said, getting up and wisely going down a few rows. I was really starting to be envious of that guy._

_Oh, shit, looks like Bubblegum and Mind Walker are getting followers from the other girls in class. White Eyes seems to be interested as she keeps looking over here. Come on...there must be a way out of this....._

"Hi,"_ came the soft voice of one of the girls in front of me. Too late, damn it! I looked up from my seat at the small group of girls and tilted my head to the side in question. _

"Can I help you?"_ I said, going into a small fraction of my ANBU mode._

"Well, yes, you can," _Mind Walker said, leaning on the desk in front of me as the others sat down in a circle around me at the available seats or desks. I haven't been surrounded like this in a long time. Last time was on a mission when I had to pose as a....well.....let's not get into that._

"How can I be of service?" _The girls around me let out a sigh of contempt.....oh fucking no way, are they fan girling on me?! Shit, shit, fucking shit!_

"Oh, we just want to talk is all, right girls?" _Mind Walker was obviously the ring leader to these girls. I shot a desperate gaze towards the other male students in the classroom._

_Although they couldn't see my face, I knew they realized what I was doing. Pup was snickering along with his dog, Bug-Man junior simply adjusting his sunglasses and looked away, not that I blame him, Lazy Bones muttered 'troublesome', the lazy bastard, Big Man was eating and enjoying the show, and Ducky was actually giving me a pity slash relieved look......that fucker.....he better be damn grateful!_

"Ano....why d-don't you t-trust anyone with a m-mask?" _White Eyes said to me. I am surprised that she'd be the first one to question me. Maybe she isn't all that shy.....then again, her face was growing redder then an tomato. _

"Everyone that has worn a Mask has saved my life more than once and I theirs, besides my Old Man of course. They are the only ones in his blasted village that actually take great care in my health and able to hold a civilized chat with," _I said, growling at the mention of this fucking village._

"Hey, who's this 'Old Man' of yours?" _Bubblegum is getting interested it seems, though from the looks of it everyone was giving me their unwanted attention....damn. At least they didn't pick up on my distaste for this village._

"My Old Man is the most important person to me. He saved me from many...beatings," _assassinations,_ "from certain people," _the fucking villagers and a couple of shinobi, _"and gave me hope in Konoha." _If he hadn't I'd imagine I would have slit my own throat a long time ago._

_The girls around me grew silent as did the males. Ducky seemed to be starting intensly at me. I wonder what's going through his mind right now._

_Getting my mind off Ducky, I scanned the faces in the classroom. They looked slightly disturbed at hearing the dark side of Konoha. They should learn this early instead of being sheltered behind their clans. _

_Thankfully, Mind Walker seemed to break the silence._

"So, why are you wearing that strange mask?" _ Ah, the big question. I looked to Scar-sensei to see what he thought about the question. I knew he was listening in. _

_He gave me a shrug and a few ANBU hand signs. Be yourself? What the hell is that suppose to mean? _

"I wear this Mask because I am in ANBU,"_ I said, dropping the bomb shell on the class. Everyone turned to look at me with wide eyes. Big Man actually choked on his chips, Lazy Bones was up in a start, the girls had their mouths open in slight shock and awe, Bug-Man junior's sunglasses slipped to the brim of his nose, Ducky looked between pissed and awed._

_Pup though scowled._

"Bullshit! There's no way you're in ANBU!" _Pup yelled out. Why doesn't anyone believe me to be in ANBU?! I know for damn sure I am not the only kid to ever be in ANBU! Crazy-Eye Itachi and White Hair Kakashi were both kids when they joined ANBU! So what the fuck!?_

"Would you like to test me, Pup?"_ I took immense joy at seeing his raging face._

"Fine then! Gatsuuga!" _He cried, rushing towards me in an amateur move. He really needs to work on that gatsuuga. It was then I noticed that the girls were still around me.....fuck._

_Quickly jumping up on the desk with a chair in hand, I applied chakra into the wooden chair and simply bashed it across Pup's head. _

_The wooden chair was instantly obliterated from the attack but it was successful in stopping Pup. My force of the blow sent him crashing into the other chairs on my row, destroying them until his back hit the wall._

"You might be thinking "why didn't he use a cool ANBU move to take me out?" or something along those lines," _I began as Pup sat up, glaring at me as he rubbed the rather large bump on his head. He so fucking deserved it. _

"Well, to answer that, you would have been incinerated if I used one of my jutsus, and Wolf wouldn't want that, no matter how much she wants to do it herself,"_ I said. Pup's eyes seemed to widen at the name Wolf. Guess he knows his sister is in ANBU._

"Believe me now, Pup?" _my voice came from behind him. Pup gasped and turned around to see another me crouching behind him, his hands in a seal to cancel out the genjutsu around himself. He continued to open and close his mouth before my clone thumped him on the head. _"And don't think I am a regular bunshin, Pup."

_Said Pup was nodding so quickly I think he might of broken his neck._

"How is that possible?" _I heard Big Man say._

"Tch, it's a Kage Bunshin," _Lazy Bones said. How big is that damn brain of his?_

"And how do you know it's a Kage Bunshin, Lazy Bones?"_ I said, very curious on how he noticed. _

"It's to troublesome to say,"_ Lazy Bones muttered before putting his head down to sleep once more. _

_I simply shook my head at the display while Scar-sensei called to sit down. Class was just about to start._

_Wait....class was just about to start?! What the fuck! After all that I had figured it be already half past the school day! Fucking brilliant. _

_While I dispelled my Kage Bunshin, I noticed I no longer had a seat on the top row....fuck. It's either sit with the fangirls or Ducky. Oh the choices! Sit with rabid girls or the anti-social Uchiha? Hmmm, so difficult._

_I jumped and sat next to Ducky, who was lifting an eyebrow at my choice of sitting. I would have sat next Bug-Man junior, but the girls were near him. Seems they have a secret code on not to sit next to Ducky less they anger their fellow fangirls. _

"Hey Ducky, hope you don't mind me sitting next to you," _I said. His eye was twitching at my nickname and a semi scowl was forming._

"What did you call me?!"_ Ducky yelled._

_As said before, this day is going to be fucking awkward, but maybe enjoyable................._

_Nah, no fucking way in hell this is going to be enjoyable. _


	5. My reason, my friends, and half Masks

**Lvmj: "Don't like this one too much, but it's all leading up to something and to get a feel for Comedy Fox in character. May skip a year or two; tell me what you guys think at the end of this."**

**EDITS: "Fixed some word problems." July 25, 2009.**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Five: _My reason, my friends, and half Masks_

_I learned that class for with the gakis was very boring. Scar-sensei wasn't teaching anything new to me! Well, some history that I might of skipped before, but that's it! _

_Besides that, Ducky was giving me a smaller glare from before at my nickname for him. He even asked me why he called him that._

_I simply looked at him and said "hair," and left it at that. Ducky was still trying to figure it out. _

_While Scar-sensei was teaching, I tried the method that Lazy Bones had adopted; sleeping. So I sat up straight and closed my eyes. Needless to say it worked for a while until all that ANBU training reared its head as my hand went up to catch the projectile that was hurled at me._

_It was smooth and cylinder shape....a piece of chalk?_

"Good to see you're still with us, Comedy Fox," _Scar-sensei said with a little smirk. How did he always know I was asleep? I don't snore....at least I don't think so. _

"Iruka-sensei! How....you...why..," _what was Bubblegum trying to say? _"How did you throw that chalk so fast!?" _Oh, ha, must have been surprising to see their teacher throw like a pro._

"I am a Chunin, Sakura, I am able to throw things much faster than that," _Scar-sensei said with smile that practically says 'I'm keeping something secret!' _

_I scoffed slightly at his tone and threw back the chalk piece faster than these gakis can see. Scar-sensei had no problem catching it and turned back to the board to continue with class, ignoring the wide eyes, one open eye if you count Lazy Bones, and writing the basic henge jutsu._

"Any questions before we break for lunch?" _Scar-sensei asked the class. Immediately a hand raised into the air._

"Actually, my question is about Comedy Fox, sorry,"_ Bubblegum said, the last part to me._

"Ask away, Bubblegum,"_ I said. She blushed slightly at the nickname and calmed herself down._

"Well, if what you say is true, about you being in ANBU that is, why are you taking classes with us?" _Fuck, I was hoping they wouldn't ask that. I expected a question like that from Lazy Bones, except he was smart about it and might of asked me in private. My head looked towards Scar-sensei for guidance._

_He gave me a slow nod. Even he was thinking about not telling them, but he and I could see it becoming a bother in the future._

"For psychological reasons,"_ I answered, growling it out. Shivers, I presume, ran down their spines when they shook in their chairs. _

"That's enough class! Go and eat and report back here," _Scar Sensei commanded. Forgetting myself for a minute, I saluted just like an ANBU and disappeared via shunshin._

_I heard many gasps before I departed. _

"Naruto my boy! It's been a long time since I'd seen you!" _Ramen Master said to me after I entered Ichiraku. I might not act it, but I always had this craving for ramen, even when I was little. There was just no explaining it! Even though I enjoy other things, like dango with Snake Mistress and Bar-B-Q with old Smoke Stack, I always find my feet leading me to Ramen Master's ramen stand. _

"Ah, Ramen Master, it's Comedy Fox with this on," _I said in a polite tone while pointing to my Mask. Sitting down on the stool, I see him nod his head._

"Ah, yes, sorry, Comedy Fox, just excited to see you," _Ramen Master smiled as he prepared a batch of ramen noodles._

"Is Comedy Fox here?" _an excited voice sounded from the back. Noodle was quickly on the scene, smiling brightly before fumbling with a cloth in her hands. _

_These are kind people who have taken up wearing a Mask similar to Kakashi White Hair whenever I come around just to make me feel better. I must say they have been doing a great job._

_Noodle finally got the Mask on and came up to me. _

"What can we get for our favorite customer?" _Noodle said threw her half Mask. _

"Let's start with a couple of pork ramen and see where that leads me," _I said, earning a small giggle from Noodle. _

"Coming right up!" _As Noodle informed, I got to work on adjusting my Mask to eat. _

_There are small hatches on either side of the Mask that separate and form a cloth sheet that hides my face from side view when I lift up my Mask frontal wise. _

_I still don't know how Kakashi White Hair is able to eat so fast with his Mask off for one second. It's something I may probably never figure out! _

_And the fucker won't tell me anyway._

_It was then that I felt the familiar presence of some of my classmates.....I shivered at what I said thought. Classmates? Fuck, they are already getting to me._

"Yo, Comedy Fox, almost didn't recognize you," _Big Man said. _

"Hey Big Man, whose with you?" _I felt Big Man's small killer intent rise before it depleted fast as I heard Lazy Bones say something along the lines of 'nicknames' and 'troublesome.'_

"Oh, uh, me, Shikamaru, Ino and Shino." _So, Bug-Man junior, Lazy Bones, and Mind Walker? Wonder how they found me._

"What are you guys doing here?" _I asked as my meal arrived._

"Oh, hello! Are you friends with Comedy Fox? Do you want something to eat?" _Noodle said with immense joy._

"Classmates," _I corrected Noodle, not bothering to see the slightly down faces of my 'friends.' _"Anyway, you guys didn't answer me?"

"I came here to eat and Shikamaru followed along with Ino, since she could seem to find you-ouch!," _Big Man answered but was stopped when Mind Walker stepped on his foot and nervously laughed._

"Ha, Choji, shut up!" _Mind Walker threaten in a low whisper, but I overheard it. _

"Choji said how good Ichiraku was and I decided to see for myself,"_ Bug-Man junior said in his usual monotone voice. _

"I see, so this little guy wouldn't be yours, then?" _I lifted up my hand to show him one of his bugs. I found it a few seconds after I shunshined out of the classroom. He must have placed it on before._

"My apologies, Fox-san. I have a problem with placing bugs on people I just meet," _Bug-Man junior bowed as his bug flew back to him. _

"Not a problem. It just tells me your cautious, not a bad thing when you're going to be a shinobi," _I said, turning around to see Ramen Master place my order in front of me. Whispering a low 'itakimasu' I dug in to this....heaven? Well, I won't go that far, but pretty darn close. I mindedly heard them place their orders, Mind Walker not ordering, a diet?_

"Hey, why are you guys wearing masks?" _Lazy Bones asked as he sat down beside me, only to get pushed to the next seat when Mind Walker squeezed herself in. Bug-Man junior sat on the other side of Lazy Bones with Big Man. _

"For Comedy Fox," _Noodle said as Ramen Master went about making their dishes. _

"I see. So if we wore masks like that, you would trust us?" _Lazy Bones asked me. _

"Not really, but for Noodle and Ramen Master, yeah," _I said. _

"I got to say it's strange to see people looking like me." _I couldn't help but threw a kunai at the voice that startled all of us, besides Noodle and Ramen Master since they saw him coming up._

"Maa, maa, Comedy Fox, this anyway you treat a friend?" _Kakashi White Hair said, holding four kunai and a shuriken and pocketed them. The others must have thrown them._

"What do you want White Hair?" _Kakashi tripped on his own feet before sitting down at that remark. I always love it when I get this reaction out of him. _

"Hokage-sama has a mission for you later on, after your...." _he let out a small chuckle, the bastard, _"after your schooling."

"I could always do it right now," _I mumbled while taking a bite of my ramen. By now the others, minus Mind Walker, were eating. _

"And let your dreams die? I don't think so," _Kakashi said before hitting me on my head. I winced and rubbed it. _

"You didn't have to hit that hard, fucker!" _I heard the gasps from my classmates. Shit, I broke my façade around them! Thanks a lot Kakashi White Hair bastard!_

_I dropped a few ryos for my lunch._

"I'll see you all at class," _I said, simply walking this time after I reset my Mask. Kakashi White Hair was giggling, reading his book once more I heard while the gakis were talking in hushed voices. Even I couldn't hear them at how far I was at. _

_So, a mission? Might as well get my head on something productive. At least the fucking Lord didn't take away my missions, not that my Old Man would be able to anyway either. I need something to unleash out this stress.....I hope it's an assassination one._


	6. Playing when I couldn't before

**Lvmj: "Hands? Fucked up beyond reason right now, but managed to get this story out with loads help from DarkLvmj after she finished her latest chapter of "Seeing the World Blindfolded," which is a pretty good story."**

**DarkLvmj: "Just glad to be of help!"**

**Lvmj: "Anyway, special thanks to Ti Wa for being the ONLY reviewer in chapter five and constant reviewer at that. Not that I not like all the story alerts and favs, as a matter of fact I freaking love them, but I would like to know your thoughts on this story on how its progressing so I can make it into an even better read for you all."**

Chapter Six: _Playing when I couldn't before_

"Remember class; you have to study the layout of the land before devising a successful trap. Go home and study on the layout of training field nine, we will be having a quiz on it tomorrow. Dismissed!"

_I was gone, right out the window when Scar-sensei was just barely on the word 'dismissed.' There was no way I am going to make it for another three fucking years in the academy! It's Hell I tell you, Hell!_

_Dashing on rooftops, I was all but a blur to the accursed villagers, I began to think of my so called classmates._

_They are alright, I guess.........well, that's a fucking lie. Only Bug-Man junior seems to be okay, the others I don't know well and I rather stay the fuck away from the girls._

_Stopping a moment, I sat down on a random rooftop to rest and get my mind situated on the mission to come. It's wouldn't do me any good to think on anything else besides the mission._

_It sometimes happened to good shinobi that thought about home rather than their mission. I knew a few of them. Good Masks and some without Masks. They were brought back dead by myself and whoever that was with me, usually Cougher or Needle Chewer._

"Might as well go see what Hokage-jiji has in store for me,"_ I mumbled to myself, jumping off the roof to the ground, scaring a few villagers while at it, and calmly walked to my Old Man's office._

_It must have been a treat to young kids and villagers to see a walking ANBU in plain sight. I usually don't do this unless I have a mission so I can appreciate the village my Old Man protects. Not the villagers themselves, but what Konoha stands for. The Will of Fire._

_One of Hokage-jiji's famous words that he lives by and, because of him, I do as well. _

"Hello mister ANBU!" _A young girl with....orange hair? That's a surprise. Anyway, the girl of what seems to be of five addresses me along with two others that seemed to be within her own age, if not exactly. I stopped to humor them a little bit, mainly on how they had the courage to come up to an ANBU._

"Hello young one," _I said politely with a tilt of my head. I cloud easily feel the stares of curiosity from the people around me. _"Is there something you need of me?"

"Yeah! Can you play with us?" _Shock spread through my system. I have never....'played' before with children of my age, not even when my Old Man began to train me and urged me to get along with kids my age for their parents always took them away. _

"Sure," _I surprised myself on how easily I said that. _"But only for a little bit. I have an important mission Hokage-sama wants me to do." _Hokage-sama....those words are foreign to me, but I had to say it in front of the kids. If not, they might grow to not respect my Old Man as much as the rest of their peers. _

_The kids shouted with joy and took hold of both my hands with Orange leading them along. I was so caught up in their cheerfulness that I didn't notice the slight tug of muscles that haven't been used in six years._

_Kids their ages, in my mind at least, were innocent and can be trusted just as much as the Masks I work with. It was then I took notice of the three little buggers that have seemed to kidnap me from meeting with my Old Man. _

_The girl I didn't know, but she already found a special place in my cold heart by coming up to me. Orange seemed to be an alright kid._

_Now the boy pulling my left arm was desperately in need of a tissue and a new pair of glasses since his current ones seem to be constantly slipping down the brim of his nose. Poor kid, hopefully Glasses will get that sorted out._

_Next comes the other boy who was grinning widely, pulling my right arm. He had, what appeared to be, a helmet and a scarf around his neck. I learned from White Hair that scarves can be lethal if used right and combined with the right material. It could be laced with metal that could be charged with chakra that could split an enemy nin in half. _

_Not that Scarf would know anything about that, of course, but he might want to trim it down a bit so he doesn't trip on it. _

"Hey, Moegi-chan, what are we going to play?" _Scarf asked Orange as he himself took up a thoughtful look._

"Ninja of course! After all, me, Udon, and you, Konohamaru, plan to be ninjas!" _Orange said with determination, throwing her tiny fist into the air followed by Scarf and Glasses crying out _"Un!"

_I stared at them, wanting to so smile at their innocent ways of thinking. They don't know how fucked up ninja life can be._

"Now!" _Orange had my attention once more. _"Enemy ninja!" _she said, pointing towards me._

_Although I didn't mean it, I went into full ANBU battle mode at her statement and forgot myself. All I knew was that there was a potential hostile ninja in the area and with three civilians to protect. Turning to where Orange pointed, I unsheathed the two ANBU standard swords on my back and held into a defensive state in front of the kids._

_Only to find myself dumbfounded at nothing to attack nor attacking. What the fuck? Oh, shit, was that their way of playing? Fuck!_

_Cursing my own stupidity at my actions and fearing that I scared the kids, I slowly turned around and was pleasantly surprised they were not scared._

_As a matter of fact, to my horror, they had wide eyes that screamed 'awesome!' If I didn't know any better, I would say they had stars in their eyes as well._

"Boss!" _Cried Scarf, striking a dynamic pose, as a certain Green Beast of Konoha would be proud of.......at that thought I shivered. Gai is the only person that I cannot give a nick name to, for there are too much to choose from! _

_Seriously! There's "Jolly Green Giant", the "Green Sleek", don't even ask, "Bushy Brows" , "Hair Bowl" , "Green Muscle" , "Youth-Man", the fucking list goes on! I fear of ever meeting another like him._

"Boss?" _I repeated unsurely, getting my mind back to the conversation as I slid my swords back in their holsters. _

"Yeah! Please train us!" _Scarf said as he bowed along with Orange and Glasses. _

_I raised hidden eyebrows at that._

"Maybe after my mission, I can train you three," _I said. It didn't hurt for them to have a leg up on their generation as I do on mine. _

_After my words they took on a sad look but immediately brightened as Scarf said, _"Alright then! Let's play before you go!"

_With that, I played like a normal child.........and I enjoyed it._

_But at the same time, I was scared. I didn't know why I was as I dodged a playful punch from Scarf. But this feeling.....what is it? This warm feeling in my chest that simply only sparks up when I am around my Old Man and other Masks. _

_I decided to push it out of my mind now and concentrate on this 'fight.' The odds of beating three opponents were not looking good for me now._

_Pftt, yeah right! Being trained by Hokage-jiji has its fucking benefits after all._

"Come on! Show your sensei what you got!" _I yelled playfully during our game of 'Ninja.' _

_I was immediately tackled by three little targets. _

**DarkLvmj: Sniffles. "That was so cute!" bawls.**

**Lvmj: Sighs. "Too cute I have to say. It's messing up his whole persona. Luckily, that will change when the mission comes."**

**DarkLvmj: Eyes grow big. "Really?! Gah! Tell me more!"**

**Lvmj: Crosses arms. "Nope." Enjoys seeing DarkLvmj pout. "Any, special thanks again to DarkLvmj for helping me write this once more. Hands are still crippled but slowly getting better."**

**The Next Chapter......**

_Chapter Seven: Sorrows and Death_


	7. Sorrows and Death: The First Act

**Lvmj: "Kind of shorter then usual, but the next one is going to be longer. Hands are still bothersome, so thanks to DarkLvmj once more."**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Seven: _Sorrows and Death_

_The First Act: Meeting the Client and setting out_

_When I made it to Hokage-jiji's office, I could tell he was very amused and delighted at my......current attire by how the wrinkles on his face curled upwards._

_My clothing was banged up from rolling on the ground. There was a mud splotch slowly sliding down the left side of my Mask, covering one of the eyeholes, much to my disdain. One of my duel ninjato was missing, I remembered that Scarf had somehow, and he must have been quiet as fucking air itself, stolen it and ran off. I will be getting it back, one way or another._

_I was known as the greatest prankster in ANBU after all. Hopefully I haven't gotten rusty in the years. It was then that my Old Man couldn't keep back the wide smile on his face._

_Old bastard, he must have been looking at me from his globe...thing....whatever the hell it is._

"How nice of you to join us, Comedy Fox. And just under two hours late even!" _I tilted my head to the left to see a woman and a female child at least two years older than me. She kept on fidgeting with her black hair. After I looked at the two I turned to stare at my Old Man. _"I was sure that Kakashi wouldn't rub off on you." _I gave him a dry look, although he couldn't see it, I know he knew what I was giving him._

"You were looking from your Spy Ball, weren't you?" _I got a chuckled out of him and an amused grin from the woman, though the girl seemed very nervous. I would imagine so for her age._ "So, Hokage-jiji, what is asked of Comedy Fox?"

_It always surprises me how fast my Old Man goes from playful to serious. _

"ANBU Comedy Fox," _I stood up straight at this._ "This is an A-Class mission for you,"_ Hokage-jiji motioned towards the two females. _"You are to escort and protect Lin Tsuchi from unknown B to A-Class nukenin. She had come here with a team to deliver a message but they were stalled the enemy for miss Lin to escape. Will you except?"

_Now, this was strange. Usually, ANBU are used for assassinations and tactician crap, but body guards? Well, only to Hokage-jiji of course, but still. As for the unknown part, that is very strange, why hasn't the Old Man assigned more people then? Though, it was sad of the kid's team to die. Oh well, that's the life of ninja._

"I know what you're thinking, Comedy Fox," _he said. Well, that's fucking disturbing I got to say. _"And yes, I know it's disturbing."

_.........................................................................................................huh?!_

_Ah, there we go, my mind sort of blanked out by that statement._

"Okay, not even going to ask you about that one, so please continue," _fucking psychic Old Man!_

"I've known you all your life, trust me when I know certain things go through your mind. Anyway, the reason why I choose you is because you are the best of what we have right now. All ANBU and Jounin to take on this type of mission are busy with other missions."

"What about old White Hair?" _I immediately said._

"Kakashi is busy with dealings in Suna on a rumor about another....well, it's classified." _Meaning he's going to tell me once I get back. Wonder what White Hair is doing all the way in Suna._

"Alright, Hokage-jiji," _I said with a small sigh. Something was telling me I wasn't going to look forward to this, and it's not the fucking giant fox in my gut._

"Good. Now, you leave in an hour. Gear up and meet Lin san at the eastern gate." _I bowed and swiftly left the scene. _

_After arriving at my apartment, I made a Kage Bunshin and looked towards it._

"Find Scarf and get my sword back," _I commanded it. _"Oh, and make sure he learns his lesson," _I got a soft chuckle from my clone as it vanished with a Shunshine. _

_That should teach the brat._

_After a few minutes of washing up, cleaning my Mask, adjusting my pouches, and dusting off my cloak, I simply waited for the Clone to arrive with my ninjato. _

_Ah, speak of the devil. Clone shunshines in, holding my ninjato and a pair of shorts._

_What the fuck? Oh, no way! He did not! Ha!_

"You took his shorts, didn't you?" _I asked, quite pleased._

"Right in the middle of the market," _Clone said with a chuckled as it dispelled itself. _

_Ah, he did take them off! But he didn't tell me it was in front of Orange. What lovely shade her face was before Clone sprinted home._

_I shook my head of the memories and travelled toward the eastern gate. Although I was a few minutes early, I noticed that the woman from before and Lin were waiting for me there._

"Here, this was from Hokage-sama," _she said, giving me a scroll, leaving shortly after._

_I unrolled the scroll and scanned it. Seems like this mission will be a long one. Damn, at least I am excused from the accursed academy and it's brats. _

_Let's see. Escort Lin to the Village of Rice Patties? Simple, not even that far away. Though I guess I shouldn't jinx it calling it simple. _

_Eh, who cares? Long as I can beat up some ninjas, life is great. _

"Well, Client Lin, let's head out," _I said, saying a soft 'Kage Bunshin' to have four Clones around her for protection. Lin jumped with a start at the bunshins and hesitantly touched one._

"Wow," _I hear her mutter, fidgeting again with her long hair._

_It was then I made a nickname for her._

"We must hurry Long Hair, I don't want the off chance of getting attacked later off guard."

_Her head spun so fast that I thought it'd break. Long Hair's face turned red from either embarrassment or anger I do not know._

"What did you call me?!"

_Ah, the start of a beautiful friendship I suppose. At least the Clones were able to hold her back, just barely though. _

**Lvmj: "So, did anyone catch the for warnings etched into the story?" Chuckles. "Oh, by the way, need to ask you all a question. A kind reviewer has brought it to my attention that this story may have to be bumped to the rating of 'M' because the language may be offensive to people. There is a poll in my profile so when you have the time, please let me know your opinions via poll."**


	8. Sorrows and Death: The Second Act

**Lvmj: "I know it's late, but I have to give my hands a rest through the night. Hopefully this will get some readers, even though its around One AM."**

**DarkLvmj: Snoring.**

**Edits: Made some more corrections  
**

Comedy Fox

Chapter Eight: _Sorrows and Death_

_The Second Act: Fourteen Masks to the Comedy Fox_

"Ano...," _I looked at Long Hair after an hour of walking in silence. I had refused to talk to her after a certain....incident. _

_After I nicknamed Long Hair she tried to attack me. I gravely underestimated her strength when she sent a very nasty kick right in between one of my Clone's legs._

_I, even my Clones, groaned at the phantom pain and clutched their groins. Long Hair had a ball, laughing at me._

"What is it, Long Hair?" _I said tensely, casting a glance at her while my four Clones, I made another one afterwards, looked around for anything suspicious as we trek down a pathway through the forest._

_At my words, Long Hair huffed and crossed her arms. _"Jerk, I am just trying to apologize!"

_I gave her an unsmiling chuckle. _"Apology accepted."

_She seemed to breath out a sigh of relief and managed a wry smile at me. _

"So, tell me, how is Konoha?" _Long Hair says. Clone number One gave her a curious look._

"It's.....," _I'd imagine that he was thinking on something that doesn't involve the villagers, _"....good." _I nearly slapped my own head at One's answer. Would I have really answered it with something like 'good'? _

_Then again.....fuck, yeah, I would have._

"Like One said, it's good." _She pouted, wanting a more definite answer then that. I sighed._ "Fine. I would have to say, truthfully, that it's an alright village. The shinobi there are hard workers and Hokage-jiji is a very generous, caring man," _I finished with pride for my Old Man._

"You must really love your Hokage to call him Jiji," _Long Hair said with a soft sad smile. Her expression actually made me wonder about her expression._

"I do. If he hadn't took care of me when I was younger, I either would have either killed myself or beaten to death," _I growled out the last bit but calmed down. _"You must understand that all villages have a dark side to them."

_Long Hair nodded at that, looking down soon after with her hair covering her eyes. _"I understand all too well, Comedy Fox," _she murmured loud enough for me to hear._

_I was about to say something else when suddenly I heard a whistling noise incoming at a fast rate._

_Taking a page out of White Hair's book, not that God damned Icha Icha one, I calmly lifted my hand and took hold of the kunai, pocketing it soon after. _

"You're going to have to do better than that!" _I yelled, standing my ground._

_Which was probably a bad idea when fourteen Masked people came out of the trees._

"Protect her Clones! **Kage Bunshin**!" _I cried, making ten more clones to fight with me. I wanted to make more but Hokage-jiji drilled it into my head to conserve my chakra, no matter how limitless it is. _

_I couldn't pull off anymore jutsus as the ninja rushed towards me. Quickly unsheathing my ninjatos, _

_Raising my right ninjato, I blocked a kunai and kicked off the attacker. I spun around and ducked a flying kick. The idiot ninja didn't know what happened when I cut off his head. _

_His body fell limp but I saw many shurikens being flung my way. I looked towards the limp body and remembered an important lesson from Hokage-jiji._

_All objects can be used in the heat of battle._

_Stabbing one ninjato into the ground, I hauled the large form of the beheaded ninja and crouched behind him. Several thunks and blood splotches splash over me. _

_I dashed away from the body, grabbing my ninjato and saw one of my Clones that were protecting Lin get stabbed in the stomach. Instead of poofing away like a normal Clone, the Clone took hold of the arm that stabbed him. _

_The ninja must have mistaken that Clone for me, since it didn't poof away, and waved over his friends that weren't engaging my other Clones. If they have looked closer, they would have noticed a thin blue, wispy like substance steadily leak out of the Clone's injury. I was lucky I had perfected the Kage Bunshin technique into longer lasting Bunshins. _

_Using a quick Kawarimi no jutsu with a nearby enemy nin, I backhanded the nin that stabbed my Clone into the other enemy nin. All four of them went down as the other ten were still engaging in combat. I quickly stabbed my swords into the ground in front of me._

"How long can you last?" _I hurriedly asked my Clone as my hands flew into seals. _

"Not long! Hurry up with that jutsu!" _I growled at the Clone and settled on the last seal._

"**Katon: Karyuu Endan**!" _I quickly lifted my Mask up and placed my fingers to my mouth. As soon as I did this, a giant flame burst from my open mouth, taking form of a large, fearsome dragon. _

_At this point, I was immensely glad for Hokage-jiji for teaching me this for the fuckers in front of me. Ha! It looks like they are going to piss themselves. _

_I willed the Dragon with my chakra to attack. The roar from it echoed into from its place and surged forward to the four nins and their comrades. My other Clones had the foresight to try to force them into the blast area. _

_The Dragon roared one more time before it collided into my Clones and the enemy nin. _

_My four clones around Lin forced her down and covered her as the Dragon exploded, throwing me back a few feet. I landed on all fours and held my ground. _

_As the dust cleared, I see a blackened, packed earth wall only fit for one person. The scorched earth crumbled to ash and the nin behind it didn't look that winded._

_Oh, a challenge for once? Good. I took up my ninjatos and settled into a stance with one ninjato over head and the other pointed towards my enemy while crouching slightly. _

_The Mask puffed up his chest at me. I guess he was feeling pretty confident on blocking that jutsu I sent._

_The bastard's hands went to a storage seal he had on him and out popped out duel hatchet weapons of some kind. _

"Come on little boy,"_ he said arrogantly. _

_I scoffed at his tone. _"I stopped being a little boy the minute I was born, bastard!"

_Not noticing the small gasp from Long Hair, the Mask and I stalked closer and circled each other. Three Clones were still protecting Long Hair as the other had poofed out of existence already._

_The enemy Mask struck first, bringing down his duel hatchets towards my head. I raised my swords and blocked the attacks. He kept on pushing, to see if his older and larger body was stronger than my own with the aid of his chakra. I would have none of that!_

_Pushing chakra into my muscles, I met him force with force and we met in a stalemate. The next thing I knew was a foot into the face. The sandal scraped across my Mask and I retaliated with a kick towards his shin, which he blocked it by kicking it away. _

_He and I growled towards one another, still in a standstill, and pushed off each other when we tried to kick with our right foot at the same time. I landed on my back and rolled quickly to my feet. _

_Seeing that my opponent did the same, I rushed towards him before he could get into stance. _

_He seemed to foresaw this and slashed towards my head. I pivoted and spun just in time for one of the hatches to tear itself into my Mask across my right eye hole of it and down towards the far side where my cheek was. _

_Coming out of my spin, I brought up both swords and imbedded them into his side, past his spine, and out of his neck. More blood splattered on me but I didn't care, as long as all enemies where down. _

_I swiped once to get the blood off my blades while the Mask fell to the ground in two pieces. _

"Long Hair, are you doing alright?" _I ask, looking towards my client to see her clinging to one of the Clones at the horror she witness. She nodded her shaking head as she looked at me and released her hold from my Clone. _

_I didn't know right then and there, but the real reason she showed such horror was not at the attempt on her life, but of how I disposed of each of them. _

"Come on Long Hair," _I said, making another Clone to replace the one lost. _"We have a long way to go."

**Lvmj: "There we go. Please check out the poll I have on the profile. It relates to this story."**

_Kawarimi no jutsu- Body Substitute skill_

_Kage Bunshin- Shadow Clone _

_Katon: Karyuu Endan- Fire Dragon Flame Blast  
_


	9. Sorrows and Death: The Third Act

**Lvmj: "This was an interesting chapter to right. I won't spoil it for you, but this chapter will give you a feel of Naruto's mind and emotion state."**

The Comedy Mask

Chapter Nine: _Sorrows and Death_

_The Third Act: Emotions and Nightmares_

_Absently, I ran my hand across the mark where that fucking enemy Mask imbedded into my own Mask. It didn't cut all the way through, but it was seriously noticeable. _

_It was always a big thing if my Mask was damaged. The fear that people will see who I truly am if it ever falls off overwhelms me as my grip on my Mask tightened. I don't want that to ever happen. I don't want to be known as Uzumaki Naruto, just Comedy Fox. My life would be so easier........_

_Then again, when is my life not easy? Hmm, trick question? I think not!_

_While I was morning over the state of my Mask, I didn't notice Long Hair staring intently at me, nor the nervousness of her hands going to her kunai pouch. _

"Hey Long Hair,"_ I said, turning away from the stream where I had been cleaning my blades. Long Hair, startled I guess, fell off the log she had been sitting on. We had made camp a few minutes ago after the ordeal with the other Masks._

"How many times must I tell you? It's Tsuchi Lin! Ts-u-chi Li-n!" _Long Hair said as if I didn't know how to say her name. _"God! You're....you're...!" _She threw her hands up in the air in frustration. It was a very comical scene I must say. _

_I couldn't help but frustrate her more._

"Am I what? Awesome? Good-looking? The best Mask you can afford?" _I said in a light humorous tone and chuckled a non-smiling laugh when her face went tomato-ish. _

_Long Hair clicked her tongue. _"Good-looking? Bah! I don't even see your face!" _She said, pointing over at me. _

"Then I am awesome," _I shrugged uncaring but I was secretly in triumph as she fell into my little trap of mixed words._

_Long Hair sputtered and opened and closed her mouth before crossing her arms and looked away. _

_Going back to my task at the stream where I was kneeling down at, I wiped away the blood from my blades with a soaked rag and dried them with a dry rag. _

_Cougher always did tell me to take proper care of your swords. For if you do, they will do their best to aid you in battle._

'_That and it would just suck if they broke in mid battle,' he added later after a small cough._

_Seeing that they were well dried, I slipped them back into their holsters and stashed the cloths back into a separate pouch around my leg. It was then I noticed the soft patter of Long Hair's feet towards me. I didn't sense any hostility, but uncertainness. _

"Thank you," _I heard the soft voice of Long Hair before I found her thin arms wrapped around my chest from behind. _"For protecting me."

_I stiffened, too shock to move at this foreign presence. What is it that civilians call it? It didn't come as a great surprise that I didn't know the term. _

_I would get pats on the back, a firm squeeze on my shoulder when I did a good job, or a simple 'Good Work Comedy Fox,' but never.....this._

_Although I welcomed the touch, I couldn't help but wonder why she was doing this and to what purpose. Damn ANBU instincts. _

"Please," _fuck, I sounded weak, _"let go." _I got the opposite reaction out of her as she clung to me firmer. _

"I....heard what you said, about not being a boy that is," _is this what this is all about? _"And I wondered if you ever had a hug in your life." _A hug? That is what is called? Hmm...._

"This....is the first for me," _I mumbled out, and shook my head. I shouldn't be doing this. _"It is nearing night fall Long Hair, please do to your tent. My Clones and I will be guarding the camp sight." _I abruptly stood up, relinquishing her hold on me and walked away towards the camp site._

_I knew I hurt her. But I can't stand it. Not now, not after all the Hell I've been through as Uzumaki Naruto. I can take some solace being Comedy Fox. I am respected, feared, I even go so far as a fucking idol to some people! But not as Naruto, never as that pathetic boy will I attain my dream. _

_Taking no notice of the streams of tears flowing from my eyes and out under my Mask, I jumped into the trees while Long Hair goes into her tent. Settling for the night, I sent my Clones to watch over._

_**Fire, everywhere, burning everything I hold dear. What the fuck is going on?! Why wasn't the alarm sounded? Is my Old Man alright?!**_

_**Hearing laughter, I look to my left and see a smiling blond boy of my age, his hands behind his head with a nervous gesture.**_

"**Who are you?" **_**I threatened with a kunai, yet the blond boy kept on laughing as if I said something funny. Next thing I hear is a soft sob.**_

_**I spin to my right I see the same boy, only he is crying, sitting on the floor cross-legged. Looking behind my shoulder, I still see the same blond laughing.**_

_**Twins? What the fuck?**_

"**What the fuck happened to Konoha!? And who the fuck are you two!?" **_**I roared at them both. Cry immediately stopped and wiped a few tears away while Laugh held his hand over his mouth, smothering his laughs and grins.**_

"**You know it's funny--," **_**Laugh began.**_

"**And sad--," **_**Cry said.**_

"**That you can't even recognize yourself!" **_**they shouted at me. I recoiled in shock and anger. **_

"**I am not you!" **_**I defied them and backed away. **_

"**Yes, you are," **_**Cry sniffled and looked at me with those teary big blue eyes. **_**"When has it been the last time you saw your reflection?" **

"**Years I bet. Ever since he got that stupid Mask and destroyed all our mirrors," **_**Laugh said while chuckling. **_

"**Shut up! Just shut up! I am not you! You are not me!" **_**I tried to reason with myself, holding my head and squeezing my eyes shut.**_

"**Ha! Get it through your skull Uzumaki Naruto!" **_**I immediately lashed out at Laugh with my kunai. He jumped away and brought Cry with him.**_

"**That's not my name! Its Comedy Fox you fuckers! Comedy Fox!"**

_**I kept on thrashing, trying to hold onto my sanity as the Twins began to laugh and cry once more.**_

_**Suddenly, I see fear cross Laugh's and Cry's faces as I hear the shuffling of a dress right behind me.**_

"**Of course, that's your name, Comedy Fox-kun," **_**a sickly sweet voice whispered into my ear as long arms in circle me, pushing me against the woman above me while she rested her chin on my head. **_

"**G-get away from her, Naruto! Hurry!" **_**Cry pleaded to me, holding out a quivering hand. **_

"**Why?" **_**I felt safe in these unknown arms. Said arms didn't seem to want to let me go as they held me firmer to the unknown woman. **_

"**See, he doesn't want to leave, boys," **_**the Woman said, lifting up her hand and waving it to them in a shooing motion before it snaked its way around me once more. **_**"So why don't you leave, neh?" **_**The Woman giggled behind me. **_

"**No! We won't leave him with you again!" **_**Cry said through his sobs. **_

"**Again?" **_**I said aloud before the Woman caressed my cheek in a soothing motion.**_

"**Shh, just forget about them. Concentrate on me," **_**she cooed in my ear.**_

"**Damn it Naruto! You have to remember! You were seven when she first tried this! Remember? Our Old Man had to stop you before she took over!" **_**Laugh said, though he was scowling now.**_

_**Wait.....my training with Hokage-jiji......something did happen. Something tried to break out when I was depressed on something....but what was it?!**_

_**I felt the Woman's arms around me tighten and her red hair sway off to the side of my head.**_

_**Red....fire.....it's there. I know it's there! Hokage-jiji was discussing something in me, something trapped, a being sealed away by the Fourth Hokage seven years ago at that time. It made me so sad....so depressed that I couldn't think, couldn't eat, I couldn't even do my mission right! I was...vulnerable.....oh no.**_

_**One name. One terrible name went through my mind.**_

"**Kyuubi," **_**I shuddered as I heard the Woman, no, the Fox laugh behind me as I forcibly broke free from her grip to join the Twins. **_

_**She....was the most beautiful woman I laid eyes on in my short life of ten years. Her red silk-like dress seemed to fit her perfectly along with her wicked smile and red slitted eyes. **_

"**So close, Comedy Fox-kun. So close," **_**Kyuubi said to me, walking towards me. I settled into a taijutsu stance along with the Twins. **_

_**Kyuubi stopped her advancement and pouted.**_

"**You're too cruel, Comedy Fox-kun," **_**Kyuubi said with a sly smile. **_**"But I will leave, for now." **_**Her form slowly disappeared as did the flames and Konoha. **_

_**I found myself alone with Cry and Laugh as I shuddered from the fear of almost being taken over by her.**_

"**Don't worry Naru....Comedy Fox," **_**Laugh said but I shook my head.**_

"**I know my true name, as much as a hate it," **_**I scowled. **_**"Thank you, both. I have long forgotten that I made you two to protect my sanity."**

_**Cry sniffled by smiled. **_**"It's alright. Just remember next time."**

_**I nodded but shuddered as Kyuubi's laugh echoed through the darkness. **_

"**My dear Comedy Fox-kun. You are mine, don't ever forget that!" **_**she roared.**_

_**--------------------------------------------------------------**_

**DarkLvmj: "Woot! This has got to be the most interesting chapter yet!"**

**Lvmj: "Eh, hopefully not. I intend on other chapters that will blow this one right out of the water."**

**DarkLvmj: "Awesome! Anyway, guys and girls! Men and Woman! Dogs and Cats! Lizards and mmpph!" Lvmj's hand closed over her mouth.**

**Lvmj: "They get it." Removes hand.**

**DarkLvmj: Sticks tongue out. "Anyway, people! Guess what Lvmj's name stands for and win a prize!"**

**Lvmj: Sighs. "Not this again....anyway, tell me what you think on this chapter." **


	10. Sorrows and Death: The Fourth Act

**Note: "READ BELOW! IMPORTANT NOTE!"**

**Lvmj: "Okay readers, slight change in style of writing. Now we are still going to use the Naruto POV style as before, but with different people, though Comedy Fox POV is going to be used mostly." **

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Ten: _Sorrows and Death_

_The Fourth Act: Different Objectives and Destination_

"For fuck's sake, my fucking head fucking hurts, fuck!" _I groaned and sat up from the tree limb, trying to rub out the increasing migraine I have building up in my head. _

"You alright boss? That was four curses in one go." _One of my Clones said to me. They seem to have taken up to calling me boss like the trio of kids I played with. As for the four curses, as they say, I am never in a good mood when I say more than three curses in a sentence like that._

"Yeah...just fucking peachy," _I growled out as I adjusted my Mask to fit properly over my face. _"Report."

_The Clone stood up at attention. _"A few bandits tried to get past us, they were eliminated and burned as ordered." _Bandits? Why the fuck wasn't I woken up?_

"Why the fuck wasn't I woken up?" _The Clone shuffled slightly, nervously even._

"You appeared to be having a bad dream, Boss. We didn't want to risk fighting you."

_Ah....fuck. Although I didn't want to admit it, my state of mind last night would have been terrible if they had woke me up. Especially on what Kyuubi tried to pull last night, the bitch._

"Wise choice Clone," _I said, standing up and stretching my joints out._ "How's Long Hair?"

"Awake. We took care of diminishing our trace at this camp sight and packing up her tent."

_I nodded, lifting my hand underneath my Mask to wipe away the sleep. _"Good, good. Let's move out then."

_Thus, Long Hair and I, along with new four Clones around her, set out on the road. We left the forest behind and entered the plains, which is not my ideal battle ground. Too much wide open space for my taste._

_Then again, I can always Kage Bunshin me up an army.....that would really something to see! Save that thought for later though._

_While I was eating a ration bar, since I haven't eaten since my lunch yesterday with Mind Walker and them, I notice Long Hair shooting me glances while fidgeting with her hair. This time I took notice of her hand inching towards her kunai pouch, though she looked hesitant about it. _

"There's nothing to be nervous about, Long Hair." _My sudden voice made her trip and fall. She caught herself though from face planting, to my amusement._

"I am not nervous!" _She yelled, waving her arms about in a comical fashion. Oh, she was nervous alright. I decided to stop and humor myself more with her._

"Then what's on your mind?" _I see her hesitate and wring her hands around her hair. This was a nervous habit of hers I have noticed for a while._

_She looked up towards me with her quivering brown eyes. I saw helplessness, fear, longing, and.....something else I can't seem to pick up. Like she is torn between two objectives. _

_I must thank Hokage-jiji for teaching me to read people. _

"N-nothing, let's go," _Long Hair said hurriedly as she took point in our little formation. I was so much amused by her reaction I didn't really care. I could protect her well from the rear and my Clones will be sufficient in the head. _

_--------------------------Change----------------------------------------------_

_That....that insufferable ANBU! How can he act so...so nonchalant about my actions! Doesn't he know I am trying to....._

_Letting out a brief sigh, I looked back to see my weird protector, Comedy Fox. _

"Something amiss, Long hair?" _he said, saying that annoying nick name! _

"Nothing is amiss, Comedy Fox," _I said, swirling my head back to look ahead, only to sigh once more._

_This was supposed to be a simple mission. Have either this Kakashi person or Comedy Fox led to an ambush point and captured. Well no doubt that the attack is going to be near home now that the ambush was demolished, but strangely I was glad about it, though scared at the time. _

_I never thought I'd get attached to him, no matter how insufferable he is! It was when his Hokage looked in on him from his Crystal Ball that first put the notch in my heart. _

_Just seeing him playing with kids and then having a peek at what his life must have been in Konoha made me want to end this mission. But I couldn't, I can't let Him have my sister!_

_This is all for my sister, to get her back, away from that vile Snake of a man! It's all my father's fault, letting Him take her away from us._

_I had challenged Him to a fight for my sister, even though I knew I didn't have a chance. But when he offered me a deal, I couldn't say no._

"Bring me either Hatake Kakashi or a new ANBU with a Comedy mask on. Only then will I give you back your sister,"_ he had said. That bastard took my Kin-chan, I won't fail! _

_But I do wonder.....what will Comedy Fox do once I turn him over. Will he forgive me? Kill me? I presume he would kill me....I don't care, as long as Kin-chan is alright. But what if I can.....no! Damn it, stop thinking about him!_

_This mission is going to Hell in a hand basket. I need to get a grip on my emotions! Comedy Fox-kun is going to be dead soon enough, so why should I be worried over him! _

_Wait....kun? Oh no, get him out of your head!_

_I started beating my head lightly, unknown to the gazes of one ANBU._

_-----------------change-----------------_

_O.....kay......Long Hair seriously needs to stop being so nervous. _

_I have been watching her for a few minutes. She appeared to be thinking to herself as she grabbed her hair and messed with it, twirling it around in her fingers and sighing a few times. Then I would get the feel of rage and sorrow....what the fuck is going through her mind?_

"Oi, Long Hair, stop hitting your head. I don't want to bring an unconscious girl to the village as an end to a mission." _My remark stopped her as she turned and marched over towards me. _

_Long Hair lifted a finger and pointed to me, her mouth open and closing as if she is trying to say something. _

"Come on Long Hair, we are almost there. After this hill, we should see the Village of Rice Patties soon enough." _I closed her mouth with my hand and twirled her around, making her take a few steps before leading towards the point once more. _

_I chuckled unsmiling at her face. It was either red from anger or something else, though more incline to the first one. _

_Once across the hill, I saw the Village of Rice Patties ahead of me. _

"Finally," _I breathed out, though Long Hair didn't look like she wanted to return home. _

_Walking up to their gates, though not as big and glamorous as Konoha's gates, I pounded my fist against the frame. _

"Who's there?" _I looked up towards the voice to see a man. _"Oh, Lin-san! Open the gate!"

_Right there, something didn't add up. Weren't they wondering of Long Hair's teammates? Questioning an unknown ninja about to enter their walls?_

_What the fuck is going on here?_

_Long Hair stepped up to my side. She appeared hesitant but leaned close to me._

"Be on your guard, Comedy Fox."

_It appears even she knows. Just what the hell is going to happen once I cross these walls._

**Lvmj: "Okay guys, here you go. Updates will be put on hold for the weekend until maybe Tuesday or Wednesday. Going on a trip so tried my best getting this out quickly."**

**DarkLvmj: "We will miss you!" Bawls out crying. **

**Lvmj: "I'll be back, but once I return the poll in my profile will be closed and I will either raise or keep the rating the same after it. So make sure you vote and leave a nice little review for me once I get back. Till then."**


	11. Sorrows and Death: The Fifth Act

**Lvmj: "I must say I was fairly disappointed by the lack of people voting in the poll, so decided to just do away with it and keep the story as it is. Besides, the only way I suppose this story now to get an "M" rating is if there is a sexual scene in it, which I do NOT plan on making, ever." **

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Eleven_: Sorrows and Death_

_The Fifth Act: The Artist and Bar_

_I find myself walking right next to Long Hair surrounded by the Mask guards of the village after entering the village. Looking around, I was surprised by how....quiet the village is. I mean, it's not all pin drop quiet, but not as loud as a village should be.._

_I spotted a sickly looking child hurriedly heading home while one of the guards here ushered him there. As a matter of fact, there are way too many ninja guards around here. Although they look as if they are relaxing, I could tell everyone was tense._

_It was here, in the middle of the village, that the Masks stopped and turned towards me. _

"Konoha ANBU-san, we will take it from here and report Lin-san to our leader. You are welcome to take a tour of our village until you are called for the payment for your mission."

_Meaning, "Scram while we get as much information out of Long Hair before we figure out how to deal with you," the fuckers. Turning towards Long Hair, I awaited her order. In all actuality with Konoha laws, I was only to take orders from her and her alone._

_She gave me a hesitant nod and I bowed shortly to her. _

"Very well. See you later, Long Hair," _I said, enjoying the curious glances of the other Masks at her then to me as I calmly walked away from this little group._

_Once out of sight from them, I created a quick Kage Bunshin._

"Follow her; make sure Long Hair is safe. Dispel yourself if anything happens to get me, understood?" _I commanded my Clone._

"Yes, boss! Understood," _Clone acknowledged. I nodded and cast a high genjutsu around him to avoid detection. _

_As we split up, Clone trailing after Long Hair, I tried to find myself a bar of some kind to gather information, as well as a bite to eat. Ration bars don't cut it now a days._

_Entering a ragged looking bar, I got a few turned heads and whispers about my Mask. I was, for once, thankful they didn't take notice of my age. About damn time I say!_

_Anyway, I stepped up to the bar tender, since it seemed all the seats were filled in this horrid bar._

"What can I get ya for stranger?" _the bar man said to me in a thick accent. Must be from someplace else besides this village._

"Something to hot eat and tea perhaps." _Laying down a few ryos, I went to go look for a place to sit when I felt something go 'squish' right under my foot._

_For fucks sake, what the hell did I just.....never mind, just don't look at it and continue on for....another squish. Fuck it, I will burn these sandals after my mission._

_Finally, I found a table in the middle of the bar with only one young teen sitting at it. I walked over and moved a chair to sit._

"Mind if I sit here?" _I asked. It's always wise to get on the good side of whoever is around you, at least that's what Hokage-jiji tells me. "You never know," he would always say._

"I don't mind, have a seat, un," _the blond headed stranger told me. He seems to be messing around with a document of some kind. I can just make out the first three letters of the top name "Aka..." but the rest is hidden by the young teen's hands. _

_The blond guy sighed and rolled up the document and stuffed it away into his coat. _

"So what brings you here?" _he says to me and looks up, only to show a slight fear at me while I saw the scratched out mark on his headband. So, a missing nin from Iwagakure no sato? _

"Whatever you are thinking, I am not here for you," _I calmly said, raising my hands up and setting them down on the table as a sign of trust. The teen seemed to relax._

"Sorry, un, but a little bit jumpy since I left my country," _he said, a little nervous while he looked at me with a curious gaze. _"Getting younger and younger each time, un," _I hear him mummer. _

"Oh? So who are you?" _I hear him gasp and then smile mischievously as a flop of hair covers one of his eyes. I really don't recognize him from any Bingo Books from other countries, but hopefully he will refresh my memory._

"I am surprise you haven't heard of me! I guess you really aren't here for my head," _he said as my food and tea was brought to me. I nodded to him to continue once the person who brought the food left. _"I am the great Deidara! My art is known around the world as the greatest of art ever!"

_Holy shit. Now I remember him. Deidara, almost S-Class missing nin. Wanted for the destruction and almost assassination of the Tsuchikage. The Terrorist Bomb Maker they call him. So these bombs must be his 'art.' _

"So tell me, Artist, do you know what's going on around here? Why the security and caution?" _Artist seemed to be delighted when I called him by his nickname before he frowned and settled in a more serious manner. _

"Well, there's a nasty rumor around here that someone is doing experiments and kidnapping people from here along with trying to take over the town." _Experiments? That doesn't sound good. In the meantime, I adjusted my Mask like I did back with Ramen Master to eat._

"There must be something else," _I said to Artist, which he only gave me a confused look. _"I was on a mission from Konoha to here. On completion, I noticed very odd things, like how I wasn't questioned at the gate nor did they ask my client questions on what happened to the others." _I know I was being vague about the mission, but missions should be kept as secret as possible. All he knows is that I'm from Konoha, which may already know by how my uniform is, besides my Mask, and I had a mission with people from this Village. _

"That is pretty odd, un," _Artist agreed as he rubbed his chin in thought. _"I myself had to sneak in this village with my Art as a distraction, though it wasn't that big to cause for this beef upped security, un."

"So does that mean I was singled out by them?" _I questioned aloud as I took a bite from the bowl of 'meat soup' they gave me.....disgusting, but filling. _

"Sounds like it, un," _Artist said as he took a look at my shiver when I forcibly ate the soup. _"That bad?"

"Fucking terrible," _I muttered to him and gulped down the tea to wash away the taste. I suddenly flinched and set the tea down and shivered once more. _

"Even the tea, un? You're not having much luck....hey, who are you anyway?"

"Comedy Fox," _I said to him as I took several deep breaths as my hand gripped the cup of tea hard. Shit, a fucking rookie mistake!_

"Something wrong?" _Artist said with some concern. Hmm, I thought he'd be surprised by my name, guess I am not well known in his former country._

"Tea was fucking poisoned," _I whispered hoarsely as my body fought off the poison._

"That's not good, un. Are you going to be alright?" _From how he said it, he knew I wouldn't be able to seek out medical help in enemy territory nor did he have knowledge of medic jutsu. These are the few times that Kyuubi comes in handy._

"Yeah, don't worry, my body is already cleansing it," _I gruff out, my breathing growing calm as I felt a presence behind me._

"ANBU-san," _a voice said behind me. I corrected my Mask and turned in my seat to see one of the Mask from before. _"Our leader will see you now," _he said, shunshining away shortly after._

_I cast a weary glance towards Artist and him to me. _

"Take care Artist, you might want to leave the village soon," _I said, getting up and walking out of the bar to see a Mask escort._

_If I would have looked behind me, I would see Artist looking towards me and planning something._

_--------------------change-----------------_

_I can't let them take away a person who so appreciates my Art, un! Whether or not Comedy Fox accepts my help, I won't turn a blind eye towards his problem. Guess I will have to reschedule that meeting with this Akatsuki organization. Not like I was going to join in the first place anyway, un!_

_When the time comes, let's see how much the Village of Rice Patties can take when they face my wonderful Art, un!_

**Lvmj: "Seems like Deidara is getting on the act. Tell me what you think. Ah, special thanks to DarkLvmj once more for helping to write. During my trip, kind of got into an accident. Let's just say it involves a car bumper, a bucket, hammer, and stapler......don't ask."**

**DarkLvmj: "Woot! Hope you feel better Lvmj! Anyway, readers! You must take a guess at what Lvmj stands for!"**

**Lvmj: Sighs. "Just indulge her, she won't stop."**

**DarkLvmj: "Darn right I won't!" Cackles. **


	12. Sorrows and Death: The Sixth Act

**Lvmj: "DarkLvmj and I worked hard on this one."**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Twelve: _Sorrows and Death_

_The Sixth Act: Sorrows_

_I stumbled slightly, acting out as if the poison in me was affecting my motor skills. The bastards stopped and actually allowed me to 'regain' my posture._

"Are you alright, ANBU-san?" _one of the Masks asked me. I could practically hear the smugness in his fucking voice._

"I am, let's continue," _I said, making my voice harsh and scratchy. They seemed to buy it as they walked on, keeping pace with me. It was soon I saw large iron gates that seemed to separate the rest of the village from this spot. _

_My eyes quickly scanned the layout as I entered the gates. There was a small plain and a large tower in the middle of it. This must be where the fucker of a leader lives. The gates closed behind me noisily and I hear a faint locking system going into place. _

_Shit, now I sense multiple chakra signatures surrounding the gates. This is quickly becoming a fucked up situation! _

_I started to think of what may happen if my theory on being singled out is correct. Either I will have to fight my way through hoards of ninjas or hide. _

_Now I've never been one to hide, but I don't think I can survive facing all these ninjas. I do think though I can take them on one on one, but in terms of 'Quality vs. Quantity" in this situation, Quantity will definitely win. _

_It was then that I had a rush of memories._

_---------------------change--------------------------_

_As soon as Boss and I went our separate paths, I began to think on the situation. _

_One: Something was entirely fucked up in this village. Besides the poverty I guess and the tons of guards, there is something wrong here._

_Two: That I, that is Boss, and Long Hair may be in danger here. There are too many signs not to think about this._

_And Three:.............well, haven't seen that one yet, but best make a third spot just in case something else happens._

_I was still following Long Hair closely when we stopped by a large iron gate. Why would they have a gate in the village? I don't know, kind of suspicious if you ask me. _

_As we started to walk to the tower, I started to feel uneasy about this. There was something...off about the tower. Something was evil lurking there. _

"Lin-san, stay here until further orders," _one of the Masks said to Long Hair as they all entered the tower. Another strange event is that they left her all alone. _

_I knew it was a risk, but I needed to talk to her._

"Oi, Long Hair," _I whispered out to the side of her. She jumped slightly but thankfully schooled her emotions. _

"Comedy Fox, you shouldn't have come here! You are in grave danger!" _Long Hair half yelled and whispered back to me. _

"I'm a Clone. Besides, I'm sure boss knows by now that something is up with this fucking village." _Long Hair breathed a sigh of relief on knowing I was a Clone. But.....I know she knows something. Something important that involves Boss. _

_Before I could ask her, the door opened and a Mask beckoned her inside. I was right behind her and crept to the shadows. Although I still had the genjutsu around me, I didn't want to take the off chance that it would fail on me._

_That's when I heard it. Screams, coming from beneath the very floor I crept on. What the fuck is going on here!? Long Hair was also very disturbed from the look on her face._

_Before I knew it, we were in a large room. On some type of throne sat a man in the shadows. He signaled the Masks to leave and they disappeared in a flash._

"Ah, Lin-chan, how much I have missed you. Tell me, how did the mission go?" _the man said playfully to Long Hair. She appeared agitated by how her hands kept on clenching together._

"I have lured Comedy Fox instead of Hatake into the village on your orders," _Long Hair.....said....what? _

_So Boss as been set up. Fuck, by Long Hair of all people! _

_But wait.....she hasn't rat me out in the room. Is she trying to give Boss a warning? _

"I see, great job Lin-chan!" _the fucker said, clapping his pale hands together._

"I have done what you asked of me, where is my sister?!" _Long Hair has a sister? I see, so he's holding her sister as a hostage._

"Back at my base, Lin-chan. She was very happy that I rescued her from her abusive father. Why don't you come and join her?"

"Never! I know your sick games you bastard! I know you are behind these terrible experiments, I won't join you!" _Long Hair....she is very defiant. _

"Then Kin-chan will be very sad," _the man said before a long metal sword suddenly erupted from what seemed his mouth towards her. Acting quickly, I shunshined in front of her and blocked the weird sword with my ninjatos. _

"Comedy Fox!" _Long Hair exclaimed, but I know she was just feigning it so this bastard doesn't know I am a Clone. The Sword suddenly slithered back to its sheath....whatever the fuck it is. From here, it looked like the fucker swallowed it._

"So you are the famous Comedy Fox....so young, yet so powerful! I cannot get over my excitement in meeting you!" _the...sicko? Yeah, going with sicko. Anyway, the fucking sicko said with obvious enjoyment. _

_But the next thing I knew was hearing Long Hair gasp in pain and push against my back before a sword protrude out of my chest. _

"C-Comedy F-F-Fox," _Long Hair said. I could feel her blood seep down by back._

_The shadowed man in front of me began to break apart and dissolved into patchest of mud._

"You....fucker!" _I managed to breath out._

"Don't worry, Comedy Fox-kun, you won't die," _I heard that fucking sicko of a fucking bastard behind me. _

_I didn't bother on coming back with a remark as I addressed Long Hair. _"Don't worry Long Hair, I'll be back." _With that, I dispelled myself._

_-----------------------change-----------------------------------_

_Breaking out of my act, I unsheathed both ninjatos from my back and slashed as quickly as I could in a circle. The enemy Masks didn't know until too late as they fell in two around me. _

_I didn't care of their screaming their last breath. I didn't care of the numerous chakra signs gathering behind me. I didn't even fucking care that I will die soon after this. All I did care was if Long Hair was alright as I rushed towards the door to the tower._

_Quickly assuming it is locked, I placed my ninjatos underneath my arms and summoned a special bunshin and sent it running towards the door. _

_Once the Clone was near enough, it jumped and formed a hand sign._

"**Bunshin Daibakuha**!" _the Clone yelled as it exploded, blasting a huge chunk of the front wall of the tower down. _

_I jumped through the gaping hole and ran towards the room where my Clone had dispelled itself, and to where Long Hair is alright._

_With my ninjatos drawn once more, I entered the room in a defensive stance. _

"Long Hair!" _the fucker was gone but Long Hair was still here. I sheathed my blades and ran over to Long Hair. Kneeling down, I rolled her on her side. She cried out in pain, but I had to check her injury._

_Her lung has been punctured, her spine severed, extensive bleeding and internal bleeding....all in one upward thrust. I started shaking with furry and....sorrow. She won't....._

"Comedy...Fox-kun. You didn't lie," _Long Hair said to me as she motioned me with her hands to help her up. No doubt she knew of her state as she couldn't move her legs and her breathing was getting harder and harder. _

"Of course not, I said I'll be back, and I don't lie to friends." _Friend...yes, she is my friend, my first non-Mask friend._

_Her arms wrapped around me with what little strength she had left._

"I....I need you to promise me something," _she said painfully. I simply nodded. Long Hair smiled and reached up towards my Mask. _

_I didn't bother stopping her as she took of my Mask. Her brown eyes looked into my glistening blue eyes as tears streamed down my grim face. She dropped my Mask and rested her hand on my head._

"Promise me.....one day.....rescue my sister, Tsuchi Kin," _Long Hair said as her hand ran down my face, over my three whisker like scars. I supported her with one hand and took hold of the hand that was falling down. _

"I, Comedy Mask, promise, Long Hair....no, not that name. I, Uzumaki Naruto, promise Tsuchi Lin that I will rescue your sister, Tsuchi Kin." _The grip of my hand on hers tightened as I said those words. Her smile brightened as she closed her eyes._

"Thank...you....Naruto....."

_I didn't know how long I stayed there, holding Lin's dead body to me. By now my legs and lower torso were drenched in her blood and I felt a shiver rush through me because of it. _

_I made two Kage Bunshin that were fully Masked, one to guard and one to carry Lin. One Clone gently took her away from me with two hands, one under her knees and one under her back. _

_I stand up, retrieving my Mask and firmly putting it on. Slowly, we all began to walk out, my free Clone having his ninjatos out and I taking point. _

_Light soon hit all of us as we stepped outside. Hundreds of ninja were facing us in the plain, separating us from the iron and village gate. _

"Lin....this is for you," _I said, my hands forming one seal before they all started to rush at me. _

"**Taju Kage Bunshin no jutsu**!" _Let the fucking battle begin._

**Lvmj: "I hope you enjoyed this, worked hard on this one. Did you catch the clues of the "Acts" leading to this moment? Hope you did. Leave a review to tell me what you think."**

**DarkLvmj: Bawls out crying.**

_Taju Kage Bunshin no jutsu: Multiple Shadow Clone Jutsu_

_Bunshin Daibakuha: Great Clone Exploshin_


	13. Sorrows and Death: The Final Act

**Lvmj: "My hands are killing me after writing this. DarkLvmj was once again a big help as always."**

**DarkLvmj: "WOOT!"**

The Comedy Mask

Chapter Twelve: _Sorrows and Death_

_The Final Act: Death_

"Let's fuck them up!" _was a battle cry of one of the Clones as the others roared in agreement. Across the plain was my own personal army of Clones, ready to destroy the enemy in front of us. They all charged, the ground shaking underneath them as if an earthquake was forming. _

_Many of them drew out their ninjatos as the others were forming hand signs._

"**Katon: Karyu Endan**!" _cried out several Clones, sending massive fires shaped as dragons towards the oncoming small army before they themselves puffed away from using too much chakra_

_But they did their job as the fire jutsu crashed into the bodies of the enemy ninja. _

_The Clones, not wanting to be dispelled so quickly, threw many shurikens at the enemy. _"**Shuriken Kage Bunshin no Jutsu**!" _They screamed out as where one shuriken became many. _

_The fuckers though beat many of them away but a few of them fell down dead as they imbedded themselves into their heads and neck. _

_The enemy must have made a Doton jutsu of their own as giant spikes of earth emerged and shot out of the ground. _

_Many Clones were caught in the path way of the spikes and were destroyed. One was actually heading towards me but I calmly raised unsheathed one of my ninjato and applied massive amounts of chakra to it before 'sharpening' it around my blade. _

"Clones, you better protect her body," _I said to the two Clones behind me, who nodded and stood right behind me to not get hit from the spike. _

_Once said spike was near me, I brought down my blade, it's sharpened side easily slicing through the pathetic spike, both sides skewing the tower behind me as I took out the other ninjato. _

_There wasn't any time to do another jutsu from either side, we were far too close together now. _

"Let's put these bastards six feet under!" _I said as my Clones clashed with the enemy nins. _

_There were instant casualties on both sides as memories of getting stabbed and gutted multiple times entered my head. I was looking at one serious head injury by the time this battle is over._

_That is, if I survive. Suddenly though, there was an explosion coming from the back of the enemy. Some idiot must have set off an explosive or something._

_---------------------change--------------------------_

_Comedy Fox so owes me one for this, un! There's so many of them! _

_Laughing, I showed the ninja how special my Art can be!_

_------------------change---------------------------_

_After another explosion, I finally encountered my first enemy. He was sloppy as he overshot a slash above my head. Only swiping my sword once, he was beheaded before another enemy took his place and attempted to stab me with their own blade. _

_Parrying with my ninjato, I kicked the foolish ninja away just in time to see a war hammer land right in front of me. Immediately backing up, I see a large man swinging the war hammer with ease._

"Fuck," _I curse aloud as I back flip out of the way of the hammer. One poor Clone was caught in the way and shot out and crashed into both Clones and enemy nins before dispelling away._

_Two ninjas come running right under the large one and attack me together. I blocked a thrust of a kunai with my ninjato and block a kick by kicking back, offsetting the other ninja. _

_Now, to my confusion, they both ducked at the same time. I quickly found out why as the war hammer was just a foot away. Driving my ninjatos in front of me as if to block it, the hammer hit and all but destroyed my blades and......._

"Gah!" _I was sent back from the impact on my Mask. My body spiraled down and hit the ground hard, rolling to a stop. Two Clones helped me up as a quarter of my Mask fell to the ground. _

_My right eye and a small portion of my upper cheek were now visible, though there was a large gash right about it. _

_It was then I noticed that those particular three were a team of sorts. No wonder they knew when to duck! Those fuckers! _

"Let's take them!" _I said to the two Clones who nodded in return. The Two sped through the battle field to come up on the side of the two enemy ninjas. They both jumped and engaged the smaller ninja as I struck at the large one with the war hammer. _

_He swung the hammer as I jumped and landed on the swinging weapon and stuck to it with chakra._

"Where did he go?" _the ninja said. I jumped off once the swing ended and struck at his head with a chakra enforced kick. _

_Needless to say, I enjoyed hearing the snap of his neck and his body tumbling to the ground. _

_Turning back to the Clones, I see one of the enemy nin is down and the Clones just cutting the other to shreds. _

"Boss! We need more Clones!" _a Frontal Clone said right before he was beheaded and dispelled. I used the smoke from it as a distraction to throw a kunai into the enemy nin's chest. He fell down but many more popped up after him. _

_I settled in a hand sign to 'call' for more reinforcements. _"**Taju Kagbun**-argh!" _It felt as if my heart was being pulled out of me! Damn it, I must have used to much chakra creating the first batch of Kage Bunshins after all the jutsu I did before them. _

"Just get us past them!" _I ducked and dodged enemy fists and weapons, trying to survive as long as I can. _

_A sudden pain erupted from my thigh and I fell to the ground. Several Clones went around to me; providing support the instant I fell. _

_A fucking kunai was what hit me. Cries of my Clones alerted me as a staff wielding enemy entered the circle as the enemy over ran the support I had. I pulled the kunai out and jumped on my feet painfully before the blade on the staff could stab me into the ground. _

_I found myself pivoting and parrying the thrust of the staff wielder with the bloody kunai that had been in my thigh. A foot suddenly entered my vision from the left and I ducked, only to feel the staff blade cut across my shoulder and chest. _

_Backpedaling, I tried to block out the pain from my head and focus on the enemy. Their numbers were dwindling, but there were only a handful of Kage Bunshin left. _

_Kunais flew down around me, each attach to it was exploding tags. Fuck! I can't jump away with my thigh fucked up!_

_Luckily, the Clones saw my predicament and dove around me and the Clone holding onto Lin's body. _

_The explosives went off, flinging me and my lone Clone back. The ones that were protecting us dispelled and left us vulnerable. Instantly I was on my feet, hurting and bleeding, and pushed my remaining Clone behind me. I took out another kunai and held out my weapons in each hand towards the enemy as one stepped up to attack. _

_Ducking quickly from the foolish ninja's attack, I drove a kunai into the back of the nin, killing him and held his body up as much as I could as a human shield. _

_Next thing I knew I was being attacked by the remaining forces and I tried my best to keep up with them all. _

_It was a blood bath...... _

_I slashed violently with my kunai like a mad man, killing the enemy with gashes across their necks. But I was not without harm._

_A spear was thrust from my human shield and punctured my stomach in an angle, exiting out on the right side of my back. Acting quickly, I kicked off the shield from my kunai and he slid down the spear and hit the enemy, causing him to crash into the ground. I then flipped my kunai over, adding what little left of my chakra left, and slashed off the wooden part of the spear, leaving in the metal sticking in me. In battle I will have no time to take it out, no matter how much pain it was causing me._

_If all else fails, I may have to tap into that bitch's power, which is a fucking last resort. Blood escaped my mouth as I tried to settle on my legs._

_Then, something white and flying caught my eye heading straight towards them. The white strange bird flapped and landed in the middle of the nin attacking me._

"KATSU!"

_Bodies flew from the brilliant explosion that I can think of no other who designed it. _

_Shortly later, Artist landed by my side._

"Artist, you have no idea how glad I am to see your art at work," _I said to him in a strained voice. _

"Thank you, Comedy Fox, but you look like shit, un!" _Artist said as his hands seemed to....chew? Holy shit, there are mouths on them! Anyway, clay Birds come out of his hands. _"Don't worry about getting out of here, we will blow them all up, un!"

_Artist laughed as he threw the clay birds towards the enemy. The birds 'cawed' once before they exploded, showering red everywhere around us. _

_There were few straglers now as Artist began to form something big. In a matter of seconds, he made a bird big enough to fit him and two people. _

"Get on!" _Artist said. I grabbed Lin's body from my Clone and hopped on. _

"Show Artist a similar way of his art," _I commanded the Clone wearily, getting blood on the white bird. He nodded and ran to the remaining ninjas and exploded._

_Artist laughed as we flew upwards, over the iron gate and towards the village one. _

"Art is a blast, un!" _he said right before kunai and shuriken started behind thrown at us. Seems backup arrived for them. Artist scowled and stood up and helped me up as well as we neared the gate. _"This is where we split up, Comedy Fox. I have enough for one big explosion that should wipe them out while you get away on this bird."

_The eye that could be seen widened. _"What about you?"

"Don't worry about me, un! After this explosion, there will be no one left to come after me! Good luck, un!" _With that Artist jumped off onto the village gates and molded his bomb, which was the size of the bird but had a very odd shape. _

"KATSU!" _I had to shield my eyes from the explosion. When I looked back, the village gate and many yards around it was smoldering ash. I faintly caught the streak of blond hair making its way east of where I was going. _

"Good luck, artist." _After knowing I was safe and the adrenaline starting to cut off from the battle, I mouthed a silent scream by how much pain surged through my head, nearly making my black out. _"Fuck," _I breathed out, setting down Lin's body on the head of the bird. Seems like we are heading towards Konoha, I must thank Artist for sending it towards that way the next time I see him._

_First things first though. I grabbed the spear blade that was in me and forcibly pulled it out. Blood splattered the bird and I felt woozy. _

_Fucking stay awake! _

_I dug into my pouch and took out bandages........this is going to be a long way to Konoha._

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_Several hours had passed before the gates of my home came into view. My eyes were blurry and my bandages red. Even with the Kyuubi in me, it would still take time and better bandaging then what I did to heal properly. _

_I looked towards Lin, frowning beneath my broken Mask. There was no way I could leave her back there. _

"Don't worry Lin, as soon as we get to Konoha, you will have a proper burial," _I said, my voice very scratchy and tired._

_Suddenly, the bird gave out, ran out of chakra I suppose, and clumped into clay and fell to the ground. I grabbed the cold body of Lin as the ground came up fast and hit the ground hard. _

_Rolling, I kept Lin's body from harm. My wounds reopened as we stopped and I looked wearily towards the gates. _

_I could make out several shapes, one tall and several short figures. Trying to call out to them, my voice didn't even reach past a whisper. _

_Thankfully, I see one of the figures pointing towards me franticly. About fucking time....someone...notice....shit, I feel....._

_My head hit the ground and I succumb into the sweet bliss of unconsciousness. _

**Lvmj: "Now, you got to leave me some reviews after this monster of a battle scene."**

**DarkLvmj: "Pouting, but it's at a cliffy! You suck!"**

**Lvmj: "Don't worry, next one will be up soon."**

_Shuriken Kage Bunshin no Jutsu: Shuriken Shadow Clone _


	14. Findings

**Lvmj: "Here it is. Oh, and very important notice after the end of the chapter. So important, that the next chapter depends on it. ALSO! I just saw the chapter titles. I got two chapter Twelves in here.....I am an idiot. Anyway, I will go correct the title for Chapter Thirteen later on."**

**Edits: Corrected some things and added a couple paragraphs.  
**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Fourteen: _Findings_

_Sometimes, I wonder why I became a teacher. The paperwork, the hours, staying up all night to grade their work, the trouble some kids give me can push a guy over the edge._

"Iruka-sensei, I need help!" _Then I remember the satisfaction of helping our future shinobi, to make sure that they are taught to live longer in the battle field. That is what I want for them. Nothing is better for a teacher then to see their students grow into fierce beings. _

"Yes, Kiba, what is it?" _Kiba has actually been easy to deal with ever since his little bout with Naruto, or Comedy Fox as he likes to be called. Currently, the class was training on throwing shuriken. _

"I can't seem to get this stupid thing to work," _Kiba said with a gruff while glaring at the shuriken. _

"Show me and I'll see what I can do," _I instructed him. _

_Kiba nodded and flung the shuriken and I immediately saw what his problem was while the shuriken itself flung wildly and headed towards the other students._

"Ah! Iruka-sensei!" _Kiba cried out once he noticed his mistake. _

_Calmly, with a flick of my hand, I sent a kunai that caught the middle of the shuriken and pinned it against a target. _

_Silence.....that's what happened when everyone saw the act. _

"Baka Kiba! That almost hit me!" _Sakura yelled out, proceeding to hit Kiba over the head with her fist....repeatedly. It was actually a funny sight._

"How did you do that Sensei?" _Ino said to me. The others all had curious eyes and Sakura stopped beating Kiba to a pulp to listen._

"With lots of practice, my students," _I said proudly as I see everyone get a look of determination spread across their faces._ "Now, Kiba," _I addressed him and he stood alert. _"You are putting too much power in your swing and not enough in your wrist movement. It's all in the wrist," _I made a slow movement of throwing a shuriken, extending my arm and flicking my wrist. _"Continue on practicing class. Later, we will be making a trip out of Konoha to the nearby forests for geological training."

_The students got to work and I relaxed a little and began to think on the past two and a half days since Naruto was on his mission._

_Mizuki finally arrived the next day after Naruto left. Seems he was on a mission for Hokage-sama. Looking to my left, I see him coaxing some of the students on the display I just did. _

_The girls were mostly the ones who noticed Naruto was gone the next day. I had to tell them he was on an important mission for Hokage-sama. Now I didn't give them the mission specks, but I did tell them that he should be back in two days. _

_It's been three days and the girls were still shooting me death glares! I never thought that Hinata's glare would be the most fearsome. Though, it is strange for Naruto to be late coming back. I hope nothing bad has happened to him. _

"Yosh! I did it Iruka-sensei!" _Kiba shouted to me. I looked over to see a shuriken imbedded in the outer rim of the target._

"Good job, Kiba. Practice more and aim for the middle," _I said, Kiba giving me a toothy grin and aimed for the middle of the target. _

_Suddenly, the bell from the school alerted me that it was time for that trip out of Konoha. _

"Alright students; you have thirty seconds to grab all your equipment and stand in three lines in front of me." _The result? Instant chaos as students ran to the targets, grabbing their weapons and shoving them into their pouches. I heard some groan in pain when they prick themselves on the sharp side, but they were quick to suck it up and return towards me._

_I was pleasantly surprised by how quickly they got together in three lines._

"With two seconds left, you're all lucky. Let's get a move on." _The class quickly followed me and Mizuki out of the Academy grounds and towards the gate._

_Along this time my mind went back towards Naruto. _

_When I first met him, he seemed cold, heartless, and had the air of sorrow around him. I couldn't understand it really, but soon after our run in he was transferred over to our squad under Hatake. _

_We really didn't bond during our missions. No, it was after a botched mission from a client was the start off of our friendship, although I wished it started a bit different._

_The client, I have long forgotten his name, gave us false information and we ended up having to carry one of our own back him in a body bag. Naruto had, once he found out that is, marched up there with enough killer intent to stop three Kages in their tracks and punched the man right in the jaw before any of us could stop him._

_Sometime later, we heard that he now uses a metal make-shift lower jaw to eat foods. Must be a pain to keep that thing from rusting._

_But after Hokage-sama found out via our report, he ordered Naruto to take classes on being 'pleasant' with the client and not strike out if it's their fault._

_Apparently, he's done this five times already, which proves bad business with Konoha if it keeps happening. So in the end, I was ordered to teach Naruto 'manners' with the clients and 'controlling' his anger towards them, which was the hardest mission I ever had in my life. _

_At first, I tried role-playing the parts of client and shinobi, I the client and he the shinobi who took the mission up. I would then act out events that would rouse his anger up. Which was a bad move._

_I was sent through a wall.....then though the other building's wall adjacent to us......out a window and finally landing in a fruit stand._

_Needless to say I wouldn't be trying that act out again until much, much later. _

_When I got back, I saw Naruto looking away from me, tensed and ready, like I was going to attack him. Slowly making my way to him, he closed his eyes when I raised my hand over to him. _

_Instead of striking him like he thought, I placed my hand on his shoulder and gave it a firm squeeze. _

"_Let's not try that again," I had said to him with a soft tone. I could tell I won him over right then and there by the way his eyes seemed to glisten and a twitch occurring on his right cheek. _

_I was broken out of my thoughts on memory road when I approached the gates and came to a stop by the gate guards. _

"Kotetsu, Izumo, what did you guys do to land Gate Duty once more?" _I asked, slightly amused by their expressions._

"You don't want to know," _they both said at the same time. _

"Well, keep it up you two. I'm taking my class out, be back in an hour or so," _I said while Kotetsu writing down what I said._

"Alright Iruka, think you can survive all these little monsters?" _Izumo said with a smirk. _

"Well, I did survive a certain 'Mask' before, I am sure these kids will be a walk in the park." _Kotetsu, Izumo and I shared a laugh at what I implied. Although they themselves have never been in ANBU, they have gone on missions with Naruto and sort of became friends with him. All Naruto needs to do is trust them a bit more._

_Turning back to the kids, I see them giving me curious look. _"Come on now, let's hurry up!" _I said quickly, not wanting to be the blunt of their questions about the conversation I had. _

_But as we walked out of the gates a few yards, the smell of blood hit me and I immediately stopped advancing, the kids stopping as well._

_Before I could scan the area for the source, Kiba was the one who spoke up. It must be his Inuzuka noise that spotted the source._

"Iruka-sensei! There's someone on the road!" _Quickly looking where Kiba was franticly pointing, I see two bodies indeed lying far off on the road. One of them looked up......my breath suddenly left me as I saw Naruto's Comedy Fox mask damaged._

_I ran, right towards him, forgetting that my students were near me as I moved at levels they could only dream of at their point in life._

_Once there, I knelt down and saw the gruesome injuries that he sustained on his mission, along with another person near him. _

_Deeming Naruto more important than this stranger, I rolled him onto his back gently, lifting the girl out of his arms and placing her next to him. I then quickly noticed he wasn't moving._

"Don't you dare die on me Naruto," _I muttered as I put my head down on his chest._

_Nothing....nothing.....there! It's faint, but he has a heart beat! _

_By now the kids had caught up to me and gasped at what their eyes saw._

"Students, stay here with Nar-Comedy Fox and the other person. I am going to get help from the hospital," _I said quickly, getting on my feet. I would have liked to take Naruto with me, but I would most likely be injuring him further by carrying him. He needs a stretcher._

_---------------------change----------------------------------------_

_I saw Iruka- sensei stop for a second with the gate guards and took off towards the hospital with the guards right along with him._

_Looking down like all the others were, I couldn't help but feel helpless as Comedy Fox laid there. Just what the hell did he go through?_

"Hey, is his friend alright?" _I found myself asking the others. Sasuke looked towards me then at the girl that was next to Comedy Fox and shrugged. Her face was very pale and blood was drenched onto her being. _

_I growled out and I felt Akamaru pop out of my hood to see what is going on._

"Fine then, I will check," _I barked and stepped over to the unknown girl. Crouching down, I put two fingers on her neck and noticed how cold she was. I immediately withdrew my hand, my eyes widened in shock as Akamaru whimpered and went back into my hood. _

"Is...is she...?" _Sakura said to me as the others leaned in.  
_

"Yeah, she's gone, been so for a while." _I looked towards the unmoving classmate of mine._

"Why did he bring her if she was dead though?" _Sasuke said out loud. He was frowning at what Comedy Fox did and seemed to think on why he did it._

_Was it a 'thing' for Comedy Fox? To not leave behind a comrade? If so, this doesn't fit, from her headband she's from another village, although none of the main ones though. A friend perhaps?_

_Comedy Fox.....I hate the fact that you make me think way too much. Ever since our run in, I had to think on my future as a shinobi. I even asked my sister questions about it! _

_Putting my thoughts on hold, I got a whiff of Iruka-sensei returning with several people. I turned around and saw it was Sensei along with several people in white clothing and two board-like structures.  
_

_----------------------------change----------------------------_

"I want nobody to review his Mask, doing so is a act of attack on Comedy Fox and will be dealt with swiftly and quickly!" _I said to the medics who nodded in slight terror. They must have done something similar to this before._

_Once there, the medics split in two groups to take care of Naruto and the girl. _

"She's dead, Iruka-sensei," _I hear Kiba say. Did he check her already? _

_I simply lowered my head to look at the girl. She must have been his friend then if he went through the trouble of bringing her body back._

_The medics lowered Naruto on a stretcher and Kotetsu and Izumo took hold of the girl's body. _

"We'll take her to the morgue," _Kotetsu said with a frown. He must be thinking along the same line I am. _

"Class is canceled for today. Return home," _I ordered the students, taking off with the medics and Kotetsu and Izumo. We all split up, the medics to the hospital, the two guards to the morgue, and I to the Hokage. _

_He would want to know what has happened to Naruto._

**Lvmj: "Alright folks, we need help on something or other wise this story will be put on a stand still. I need an ANBU mask name for Tenzo, nicknames for Kotetsu and Izumo since we can't think of any. Remember, they must be of some relation to what they define them, sort of, like their clothing, hair style, jutsu, ect."**

**DarkLvmj: "So please help! Also, we are doing a 50****th**** review special thingy. So every 50****th**** review, that reviewer can have an Omake for this story! Isn't that so AWESOME?!"**

**Lvmj: "DarkLvmj convinced me to do this....." sighs. "So we are looking for whoever was the 50****th**** reviewer and contact him or her later on. So now we await for the 100****th**** reviewer for their Omake."**

**DarkLvmj: "That would be so awesome to get a hundred reviews! WOOT!"**


	15. The Good Doctor

**IMPORTANT! READ!**

**Lvmj: "Alright readers, for some reason neither of us was able to respond to you ladies and gentlemen, which frustrated both of us severely since we try to get every single one of you. Also, they didn't appear in our 'Review' section thing for this story, but somehow still added up to how many reviews we got. Strange and confusing."**

**DarkLvmj: "It totally SUCKS!" Pouting**

**Lvmj: "Agreed. But, we got some names. For Kotetsu and Izumo it shall be Yaiba and Toku, meaning Sword and Shield. This is based on from what Tocool4ice had to say is because they are good friends. And I agree, plus they work well together during battles like the time they faced off against Kakuzu and Hidan, so Yaiba and Toku are fitting names. So thank you Tocool4ice for the names."**

**DarkLvmj: "Now! For good o' Tenzo! Shinrin, meaning Forest. This was given by Dominican Kitsune! THANK YOU!!!! Now we all know why Tenzo gets that name for his Mokuton abilities, so it's a perfect name!"**

**Lvmj: "To the other two that sent names, thank you very much for your contribution. Thank you TenjuOodora, and Kyuubi223. If we happened to miss anyone else, we are sorry."**

The Comedy Fox

Chapter Fifteen: _The Good Doctor_

_Konoha Hospital has been quiet as of late. I must admit I am rather bored. No shinobi to patch up, no letting the family know that he passed on in the most painful way possible, not even a bloody damn thing to do! _

_I sighed and twirled my hair around my finger. Sometimes I wish a certain bundle of coldness would saunter right through the door again. I haven't seen Naruto-kun in a number of months now. I know he's still alive though, thankfully, having been his personal doctor since he was a boy. It is strange, though, seeing what was once a ray of sun shine turn into an icy cold person. _

_Sighing once more, I couldn't help but feel sorry for the little tyke. What is he; nine, ten, eleven? Maybe I should take a peek at his medical file again, to see what age he is. _

_Before I could do so though, the doors were flung open._

"We got an ANBU down!" _one of the medic yelled out once when they entered the hospital. I Mildly wondered which ANBU it was. _"We need the doctor to Comedy Fox here on the double!"

_Naruto-kun is hurt?! _

"I'm Doctor Anju, Comedy Fox's doctor. Have you run a scan jutsu on Comedy Fox?" _I said immediately, ushering the medics to follow me. _

"Yes Doctor. He has multiple gashes, several puncture wounds, he has lost a lot of blood, and some internal bleeding along with major case of chakra exhaustion." _That last one actually through me for a loop. For Naruto-kun to have chakra exhaustion, he would have had to fight off an army!_

_Eventually, we arrived in one of the Special rooms for ANBU personal, not to mention Naruto-kun's own private room. The medics heaved poor Naruto-kun up from the stretcher and placed him in the hospital bed._

"Call my team and have them report to the Special ANBU room!" _The medics gave me a quick salute before running. My team is loyal to me and to the Hokage. I had to hand pick them for some of the staff holds a grudge to Naruto-kun, so I can trust them once I remove his ANBU mask._

_Going back to Naruto-kun, I cut away his ANBU armor and clothing with a chakra scalpel. I doubt the cloth he wore was salvable from the amount of blood and tears that were on it. Disposing the cloth away in a bin and putting the armor to the side, I cut away his rush job at bandaging and also placed them in the bin._

_What I saw was horrifying and leaves me to wonder how he stayed alive this long with wounds such as these. The wounds were red and open, infection seemed to have spread and there was bruising around the area, no doubt on those were the cause of the internal injury, along with the puncture wound as well. All that was left was his broken mask. _

_Just then my team arrived, looking worried as most of them knew or heard of Naruto-kun._

"Most of you knew this, but his identity does not leave this room. If I hear so much of a damn rumor about it, I will maim you, heal you, send you to Ibuki, and freaking kill you, got it?" _I was pleased to see them nod rather vigorously. _"Let's get to work! Get a breathing unit and anesthetic to him! We are going to be here for a while."

_Shooting off command after command, we all set to heal Naruto-kun the best we can._

_------------------------change---------------------_

_Hokage-sama and I were waiting in the hallway with eight of my students, who stubbornly followed the medics and not returning home. I could see many of them were worried, curious, and even saddened. Sasuke's worried form was the most surprising out of all of them though._

"Iruka-sensei, is Comedy-kun going to be alright?" _This was the umpteenth time Sakura and Ino have asked me. They even took it to address him by the first word of his ANBU name. _

"Yes, Sakura, Ino.....Hinata," _I added once I saw her worried eyes as well, _"he will be fine. We got him just in time." _It was still surprising to see them all sigh with relief. _

_Just then Naruto's doctor came walking out of the double doors that led to the quadrant of the ANBU section of the hospital. She let down her auburn hair she kept up when operating and her green eyes shifted over to us._

_I remember her, she use to be a classmate of mine when I was in the Academy. Anju Hisako._

"Hisako-san, is Comedy Fox....?" _I left the question hang, knowing that I should get my hopes up. Hisako-san looked surprised and sort of confused when I addressed her by her name, but smiled in the end._

"Iruka-chan, nice to see you again," _she said teasingly and I blushed slightly. That is what she always called me back in Academy. _"Comedy Fox-kun is well, we just stabilized him, but he is very weak from his wounds, no matter how much 'help' he receives." _She gave Hokage-sama and me a knowing look at the implied 'help'. We both nod to her, understanding the grave situation. _

"Can we visit Comedy-kun?" _two female voices said behind me. Hisako-san looked behind me and I can tell she was just tickled pink when she saw everyone._

"I'm sorry, but only Hokage-sama and Iruka-chan can see him," _she chirped with a mocking smile. She loves to do this I imagine._

_The girls pouted and the guys frowned from behind me. _

"Plus," _I added, _"I am sure he wouldn't want you to see him unmasked." _With satisfaction, I hear several groans while Hisako-san chuckled. _

_------------------change--------------------------_

_Pain.........that is what I woke to along with a stiff fucking back. I tried to open my eyes, only to find that one of them was obscured by a wrap of bandages. What the fuck happened?_

_With my lone eye, I looked at the familiar white ceiling. I made it, to Konoha. But how did I get here? Fuck, why can't I....._

_Mission....._

_Long Hair....._

_Ambush....._

_The Village....._

_Artist....._

_The Enemy..._

_Tsuchi Lin...._

"Lin!" _Fear and sorrow swelled in my heart as I jolted up. Bad move. Pain surged through out my body, forcing me down onto the stiff bed. _"That fucking hurt," _I said, my voice harsh and dry. _

_Okay, assess the situation. Looking around, I noticed I am connected to a heart monitor, along with a breathing unit pumping fresh oxygen over a breathing mask that was wrapped around me. _

_Although I rather had ripped off the damn thing and reclaim my Mask, I didn't, since I knew better now. The first time I did that, the Good Doctor let me have it. She didn't beat me; more rather scold violently and taped the breathing mask around my head._

_Looking to my right, I see an IV pole that ran fluids into me. I'd imagine this was for my lack of blood, since I feel very fucking woozy. _

_The door opened then and a female nurse came in with another bag of fluid. _

"Excuse me," _I said, startling her as she jumped in the air and fumbled with the bag of fluid. It was comical really, but she managed to catch it by jumping forward when the bag flew over towards me, her hand out stretched over my torso and her dangerously leaning over me._

"Ah, sorry," _she nervously said. _"I'll go get Doctor Anju." _She placed the bag on a shelf next to the bed and ran off._

_Ah, the Good Doctor, I hope she is well. It's been...what? Months? Oh well, I am sure she is just as insane as ever._

_My thoughts suddenly turned towards Long Hair....Lin. Closing my eyes, I could just picture her...alive and well...before we reached that fucking village. _

"Naruto-kun?" _I jumped slightly, wincing as I turned to see the blurry image of the Good Doctor._

_Wait....blurry? The Good Doctor reached over towards me with a tissue, wiping my lone eye._

"Are you alright, Naruto?" _she asked me, dropping the kun suffix while sitting down on a stool beside the bed. _

"I failed, Good Doctor," _I closed my eyes while the Good Doctor dabbed my eye._

"It happens to be the best of us, Naruto." _She ran a hair through my hair. I imagine that someone must have sponge bathed me while I was out, since I don't smell or feel blood on me. _

"How long was I out?" _Her hand stopped and rested on my head. _

"Five days. You had lots of visitors since then," _she chuckled at me, pointing to the towards the back of the room where I saw a very familiar desk of Hokage-jji's and a small table off to the side holding various flowers and 'Get well soon' gifts._

"Did they see my face?" _I immediately asked. _

"No, we put a genjutsu on you so your face was seemed like a blur to them. The girls especially were upset." _The Good Doctor smiled at me knowingly. I breathed a sigh of relief at this. _

"I....I came here with someone. Where is she?" _She smiled sadly at me, already use to the fact that I would bring back ally's dead or unable to move on my back. _

"She has been buried in the Shinobi section." _The Shinobi section....it was an honored piece of land fit of shinobi who have given their life during their duty to Konoha. _

"Good, Lin deserves it," _I said while the Good Doctor had a look of surprise on her face._

"You called her by her name?" _Nodding, I felt my throat tighten up. _

"Tsuchi Lin," _my voice cracked a little as I struggled to keep it under. _"I made her a promise." _I turned away from the Good Doctor, her hand leaving my head. _"Please, leave me Good Doctor."

_I didn't hear her say anything, but she squeezed my shoulder in comfort. Before she went though, she changed the fluid bags and headed out the door._

_Hearing the door click shut, I let out the anguish I held in._

**DarkLvmj: "So sad!" Bawls out crying.**

**Lvmj: "Yes, sad indeed."**

**DarkLvmj: "Alright! Now leave a nice review and so we can get to work on Chapter Sixteen! But for now, OMAKE by Dominican Kitsune!"**

**--------Omake, WOOT!--------**

"Look, Kakashi, I am your Hokage, and I am ordering you to stand down!" _What the hell? Damn it, I just fell asleep! What the fuck are they arguing about?_

"No, Hokage-sama! I will not stand down when it comes to my love!" _Wait, hold on, back up, White Hair's love?! This could get interesting. Secretly opening the eye that wasn't covered, I looked on as Hokage-jiji and White Hair argue about White Hair's 'love.'_

"Hatake! Don't make me put it in Mission form!" _Ouch, bringing out the big guns, eh, Hokage-jiji?_

"Even if you do that, I will withdraw myself from Konoha!" _Holy shit! Is White Hair says what I think he's fucking saying?!_

"You would go Missing Nin on us?" _Hokage-jiji said, baffled. Hell, I don't blame for saying it like that._

"I would, all for the love of my life," _White Hair said proudly. Note the self, find out who this 'love of' his 'life' is._

"Now, Kakashi, you know I love her just as much as you do." _Er.....what the fuck?! A love triangle? This is getting good! _"And she is the only one left. I am willing to Janken against you for her." _Janken.....rock, papers, scissors? They are risking their love over a game of Janken?!_

"Janken?" _White Hair said disbelieving. Ha! I knew that White Hair wouldn't risk his 'love' over a silly game of-_ "I accept!" _.......what an idiot._

_White Hair and Hokage-jiji settled into a stance. _

"Jan-ken-pon!" _they said together, showing their hands on 'pon.' Hokage-jiji had Rock along with White Hair._

"Again!" _they both yelled. _"Jan-ken-pon!"

_This time White Hair had Paper......along with Hokage-jiji. _

"Damn it, again!" _White Hair said. _"Jan-ken-pon!"

_As luck would have it, or bad luck depending on how you look it, they both had Rock, again. This is going to take forever._

_................................................................................................_

_................................................................................................._

_And it did. Two hours have passed and they were still at it!_

"One....one more time, Kakashi," _Hokage-jiji said, sweating along with White Hair._

"Alright. Jan-ken-PON!" _this time, it was different._

_White Hair Scissors while Hokage-jiji had Paper._

"No!" _Hokage-jiji cried out._

"Yes, true love conquers all!" _White Hair said, showing a 'Peace' sign in the air. _

"Yes. Take her, Kakashi, you won fair and square." _She's here in the room?! Where?! I leaned forward a bit; not bothering on hiding the fact was awake. _

_White Hair went over to a small box on the table near my bed and opened it with the air of excitement and caution._

"The Collector's Edition of Icha Icha Paradise, signed by Jiraiya-sama himself!" _I promptly fell out of bed once I heard what their fucking 'love' is, landing on my back while my legs were leaning against the bed.. _

"Oh, Naruto-kun, you're awake?" _Hokage-jiji said with a raise of his old brow._

"Hai," _I grumbled. I can't believe I spent two hours watching them over a fucking hentai book! _

_I crawled back into bed, trying to go to sleep. The last thing I heard before going to sleep was baka White Hair giggling like a pervert. _


	16. My Warden My Mission

**Lvmj: "DarkLvmj forced me to write a chapter. I do apologize for the long wait; College has recently started again, so devoting most of my time to it. DarkLvmj has recently started College, it's a hassle for her, so don't expect "Seeing the World Blindfolded" to be updated too much as well as this story."**

**DarkLvmj: Pouts. "Although we will try our best!"**

Chapter Sixteen: _My Warden/ My Mission_

_**Hearing his sorrow, his anguish.....such sweet music to my ears! I squealed at the thought of Naruto-kun suffering. Oh how I wonder just what my Warden is doing. **_

_**I could peer though his memories to see what is happening, but where is the fun in that? I much rather ask him personally. **_

_**Giggling, I looked around my cage. It was much bigger when I am in this 'human' form. Although I really rather be in my true fearsome form, it gets a little cramped not being able to move about. **_

_**Seriously, a giant Kitsune in a human body is going to get claustrophobic sometime. That blond headed fool should have made space for a Demon such as me.**_

"**Oi, what are you all happy about?"** _**Looking past my cage, I see one of the two Guards with a smile plastered to his face. Laugh, a being created by Naruto-kun to help contain me in this cage.**_

"**Just listening to the pathetic Warden bawling over whatever insignificant thing in his life," **_**I said with a toothy smile. Laugh shuddered at my 'sweet, adorable' smile and backed away from the cage. **_**"You know, Laugh, why don't you come in here with me? I am awfully lonely in here, no one to....cuddle with," **_**I purred sweetly, just able to say that last line before I gag myself. A great Demon such as I has no need for cuddling. **_

_**------------------change---------------------**_

_**You know, Kyuubi freaks me out some times. Well, mostly now a days. **_

"**You do know that you are trying to seduce a ten year old, right?" **_**I asked her, dumfounded that she keeps on trying to.**_

_**Kyuubi had the decency to blush, out of embarrassment I assume, at what I said. **_

"**Can't blame a Demon for trying," **_**Kyuubi said with a shrug of her shoulders. And you know, I really can't blame her. Guess I have been use to her advances since Naruto created me. But still......**_

"**Still, it really freaks me out," **_**I muttered. Kyuubi laughed at what I said, making me shiver slightly. She really has a sweet yet 'I will totally kill you if I get out' kind of laugh. **_

"**Then I will stop....for now. Wait till little Naruto-kun hits puberty, then I shall have my way with him," **_**she laughed. **_

_**Okay, that sounded so wrong, even from Kyuubi. **_

_**Hearing quiet sobs, I turn away from the Demon to see Cry jogging towards me. **_

"**How's Naruto?" **_**I asked him. Cry wiped away the tears that were constantly streaming down his cheeks.**_

"**He's doing better, though his mind is situated on Lin at the moment," **_**Cry muttered, his never ending tears streaming down his cheeks.**_

_**I sighed at this. **_**"Poor guy."**

_**Kyuubi roared out with laughter, sending Cry to scamper behind me. **_**"I can't believe you are pitying yourself! Oh, it's just too much! Too much I tell you!" **_**She rolled on the ground, clutching her stomach. **_

_**---------------change------------------------------**_

_**Oh my goodness! It's just too much! Seriously, a persona of Comedy Fox pitying him? Never a dull moment in this boy's head!**_

"**Oooh, oooh," **_**I started to calm down, wiping away my tears. **_

_**Cry and Laugh merely looked at me, I suppose disgusted from my laugh, but who can tell when their faces don't change? **_

"**So did they burry poor Lin-chan yet?" **_**I goaded, but I got a surprising effect.**_

"**Do you ever shut up?!" **_**Cry shouted at me, his hands banging on the cage, creating a loud clanging sound.**_

_**I whimpered and clutched at my ears, trying to block out that accursed noise! My knees gave out as I shut my eyes.**_

"**Stop it!" **_**I roared. It did nothing as Cry hit the bars again.**_

"**Oh? Don't like it, eh? Tough!" **_**I looked up at Cry using the meanest glare I could muster, but I gasped at him. **_

_**His eyes were red, though there were still tears running from his eyes, with a red aura pertruding around him.**_

"**Cry! Stop!" **_**Laugh slapped Cry upside his head, instantly stopping the...interesting change. **_

"**S-sorry," **_**Cry said towards Laugh. **_

_**I was about to ask them just what in the nine layers of Hell was that when the suddenly disappeared on me.**_

"**Damn....at least my Warden is finally awake." **_**Purring, I sat and waited to see what kind of emotions that will pass my way.**_

_**-----------------Ch**__ange----------------------_

_Waking up, I find myself in the same bed I have been in for the past six days now with, surprising me, my broken Mask on. It has now been one day since I woke up from my mini-fucking-coma. _

_Looking in front of me, I see Hokage-jiji's desk, with him working behind it as usual. I still haven't figured out how they get the desk in here. _

"Ah, Comedy Fox-kun, how are you feeling today?" _Hokage-jiji asked me, still working on the paper work. I have long come to adjust that Hokage-jiji is just some sort of physique. Scooting up into a sitting position, I answered him._

"Fine, Hokage-jiji," _I said, though I knew I didn't sound convincing when Hokage-jiji stopped signing his paperwork. He then lifted his hand in a wave, and I knew that the five Masks that were hidden left in a flash. Shit!_

_Hokage-jiji stood up, I could hear his bones creaking from the strain, and walked over to me. His old withered hand took hold of the flap of his Hokage hat and pulled it off, setting it over my legs. Knowing what he wanted, I moved over a little to allow Hokage-jiji to sit next to me. _

"Naruto-kun, tell me the truth," _he asked me. My Mask slowly slid down from my face when I removed it. It was pointless to lie to me, I knew, damn it, but I couldn't help but hope he wouldn't into it._

"Seriously, Jiji, I am fine.....I already mourned over Lin," _I said, frowning over her name. _

_I felt Jiji's arm come around my shoulders and give a firm squeeze on my shoulder._

"I know you have, Naruto. But there is something else, isn't there?" _How....no, don't think about it too much Naruto. Remember, you have already come understand that Jiji can read minds or something._

"I...I made a promise to Lin, as Uzumaki Naruto," _I said. Jiji actually looked surprised at this. _"But I need your help, Jiji."

_Jiji rubbed his chin in thought. _

"What can I do?" _he said to me with that grandfatherly smile of his._

"I need information about the Village of Rice Patties, and some freak that seems to swallow a sword....at least that's what I think that's what he did, it was pretty dark," _I muttered the last part, though Jiji seemed to stiffin up. _

"And what was this promise you made to Lin?" _Jiji asked. _

"Her sister.....I have to find and save Tsuchi Kin."

**Lvmj: "Sorry it's short, but hope you like it."**


	17. Visitors and Pocky Eye

**Lvmj: Hands wrapped up. "Okay...that was very, very painful to write." Sighs. "I managed to get this out today, though College has been kicking my ass. I would normally have DarkLvmj to write, but I have forced her to study and read. She needs to do better in College."**

**DarkLvmj: Sticks her tongue out at him. "Shush! I am doing great in my classes! You won't because your hands are all messed up now!!" Grumbles. **

**Lvmj: Looks down at hands. "I suppose....tell you what, you will write the next one." **

**DarkLvmj: Glares at him. "I better, or I will ducktape you in the corner next time!"**

**Lvmj: Gulps. "Please enjoy the story."**

Chapter Seventeen: _Visitors and Pocky Eye_

_I fumbled with the IV that was sticking on my arm. Hokage-jiji had to leave for a meeting, so I was left alone to do nothing.....I am fucking bored. _

_Leaving the IV alone, I picked up my Mask, his hand running across the damaged area. The bandage that was covering my eye was finally taken off. The gash was right above it so the Good Doctor didn't want to take chances and covered my whole eye. _

_Letting out a sigh, I slipped my broken Mask on, feeling slightly naked that a piece of the Mask was missing. _

_I was startled when someone knocked on the door._

"Who is it?" _I asked in a slightly threatening manner. _

"I-i-it's us," _a female voice said. I could barely hear it! Wait, I recognize that voice...._

"Come on Hinata! Say it louder!" _Mind Walker.....yeah, I'd recognize her voice anywhere. So that must have been White Eyes in the beginning._

"Can we come in?" _Bubblegum is here as well? Damn, all girls.....if White Hair was here, he would say something perverted._

"Uh, give me a sec," _I said, taking off my Mask. I grabbed a roll of bandages and wrapped it around my eye and lower cheek so they wouldn't see part of my face. Using a bit of chakra to my index finger, I poked a hole to look through and placed my Mask back on. _"Come in."

_The girls came in and I took great pleasure in seeing them frown when they saw my Mask firmly in place. _

"So, Comedy-Kun, how are you doing?" _Bubblegum asked in a very quiet voice. If I didn't know better, she would be a twin of White Eyes._

"I am fine, a little stiff, but manageable." _I paused a bit, remembering how she addressed me. _"Comedy-kun?"

_The girls blushed at my words. I sighed inwardly at this, sincerely hoping they grow out of this stage of their child hood. _

"What happened to you?" _White Eyes managed to say without the stutter. Surprising, really. _

_Well, I guess I could tell them. Besides, I know they will probably bug me anyway during class. Plus Hokage-jiji didn't tell me to keep a lid on it._

"I suppose I could tell you, since the mission was a botched one anyhow," _I said. _"I was on an escort mission. The Client was....forced into lying to me," _I said. I won't tarnish Lin's name. _"When we got to the drop off point, I was worried for Lin, I mean, the Client." _Damn it, you're slipping up Naruto! _"I sent a Kage Bunshin to tail her and met an interesting fellow by the name of Artist. Soon after, I was poisoned," _I stopped for a few seconds as they gasped. _"Don't worry, my body took care of it. Anyway, to make a long story short, my Kage Bunshin alerted the Client was in trouble, I killed their Masks and ran to her....but I was too late."

_The girls around me had teary eyes, covering their mouths as I told them about the mission._

"What happened afterwards?" _I looked sharply towards the door to see Lazy Bones and the rest of the guys. How the fuck could I not hear them? I must be more injured then I thought. The boys walked hesitantly into my room and stood behind the girls. _

"I practically faced an army of their ninja," _I said off handedly. Of course, the way I said it caused a few gaping mouths from the boys and girls, especially Ducky. _

"So...that mean's your stronger then...," _Ducky began. He must be talking about his brother._

"No, I am not stronger then Pocky Eye," _I said, earning a small snort of amusement from Ducky at the nick name of his brother. _"If Pocky Eye was in my position, trust me, he would have decimated them with minimal injuries and gotten the Client out of there alive and well." _Ducky seemed to nod at this gravely. _

"Pocky Eye?" _Pup asked aloud. Shifting my gaze over to Ducky, I waited for some type of confirmation to continue. He gave me a small nod._

"Pocky Eye, aka, Uchiha Itachi," _I said, earning more gasps all around. The know about him then. _"I was teamed up with him for a short time in the beginning of my career, though I was a fresh Mask at the time, and no, I won't tell you his Mask name," _I said towards Pup when he raised his hand. He soon put it down._

_Taking a short breath, after I saw the looks of curiosity from each of them, I continued on. _"In the beginning, Pocky Eye, Dolphin, myself, and Inu were all one group, with Inu as captain. We did many missions together, I was always lagging behind since they were much more powerful and experience then I was. It was always Pocky Eye to wait up for me to catch up. He was always looking out for me. I don't know why he did, but he was one of my first Mask friend because of it."

_Ducky starred at me with big eyes. I could see so many questions built up in his head. _

"But once I heard about the Uchiha...incident," _I choose my words carefully for Ducky. _"Something didn't add up. He would always preach to me 'The Village comes first' all the time. That he loved his family, especially you, Ducky," _I said. Ducky's eyes started to water when I told him. _

"Then why did he do it?" _Lazy Bones asked me. _ _I simply shook my head. _

"That, I don't know. I guess something snapped in him from taking one too many missions, he was young when he joined the ANBU." _I am younger then he was when he first joined....will I snap like him one day?_

_No, I must not. Unlike Pocky Eye, I can level this entire village and then some if I snap. So no, I mustn't break, no matter how much strain it becomes. I wonder, Uchiha Itachi, what did make you snap to slaughter everyone but Ducky. _

"Yoohoo, Comedy Fox, you okay?" _Big man was saying to me, snapping me out of my little day dream. _

"Yeah, sorry, was thinking about something," _I said, waving my hand about dismissingly._

"How you might snap like Itachi?" _For fuck's sake, someone really needs to give Lazy-Fucking-Bones a damn IQ test!_

"Something along those lines," _I said, suppressing my snarl at him. He's been getting real perceptive of me. _

"Whatever, I'm out of here," _Lazy Bones said, walking away. _"Try not to get killed before graduation, or after we play a game of Shogi together, whichever comes first," _I hear him say. What....the.....fuck? Strange kid. Big Man was waving at me, I nodded back, as he followed._

"Guess we better go, see ya Comedy Fox," _Pup said with a feral grin as his dog barked out a farewell. _

"Ah! Look at the time! Come on girls, you promised me to help at the Flower Shop," _Mind Walker said as she grabbed Bubblegum's and White Eye's arms, dragging them reluctantly over to the door._

"Bye," _they both managed to get out before Mind Walker rushed them out of the door. Now, it was only me and Ducky here. _

"Can you....tell me about my brother's time in ANBU?" _he asked in such a small voice. _

_I only had one thing to say to Ducky._

"Pull up a chair. I got loads of stories for you."

**Lvmj: "Hopefully I will get another one out next week or at the end of this one."**


	18. Mask Beginnings: The First Act

**Lvmj: Duck taped to a chair. Sighs. "DarkLvmj actually kept her word on duck taping me to my chair." Grumbles.**

**DarkLvmj: Swinging an empty roll of duck tape on her finger. "Darn straight I did! Now, IMPORTANT NEWS!!! This section of the story is told by MANY Views by Comedy Fox, as best I and Lvmj could anyway, to Ducky and the breaks that you will see is when Ducky interrupts to ask questions or something else happens. Okay? Now, on with the story!"**

**Lvmj: "Before that, be for warned that we may have misspelled "Yondaime", which is most likely we did, so if anyone could give the correct spelling, we will appreciate it. Oh, and also read the bit after the story, important news on Omake."**

Chapter Eighteen: _Mask Beginnings_

_The First Act: The Meeting_

_I was nervous about the meeting. What Hokage-sama was thinking, I didn't know. Let's see....I was about six years old when Hokage-sama introduced me to Pocky Eye. It was a 'training assignment' from Hokage-sama, to see if my stamina and stealth skills were Mask Level, for you see, I have been training for two years nonstop underneath the guidance of Hokage-sama._

_--------------Change: PTPOV (Present Time Point Of View) -------------_

"Mask Level?" _Ducky asked me. He had pulled up a comfy chair that was usually for guests. _

"Oh, sorry," _I said. _"It's jargon for ANBU Level."

"Oh....," _Ducky said, but I could tell he had another question. _"Jargon?"

_This is going to be a long time before I complete this story...._

"Jargon is kind of a 'word' that is slang for an official word," _I explained. _

_Ducky frowned. He has another question, doesn't he? _"When you said you have been training for two years nonstop, what exactly do you mean?" _Oh, I guess he can get confused by that._

"Means just what I said, nonstop. I have no family, Ducky, no friends back then and no hobbies to keep my busy. I dedicated my early life into training and surviving in this world."

_Ducky seemed to turn his frown into a thoughtful pose. _"That's how you gained power then, from keeping everyone away," _Ducky said with a.....creepy tone in his voice._

"No," _I said, Ducky looking at me in shock. _"I always had Hokage-sama in the beginning. When I was young I craved for attention, which was never given to me besides Hokage-sama."

"Still, you didn't have friends then, right? They would have weighed you down from being powerful," _Ducky argued with me. What is wrong with this kid?_

"Yes, I have friends, Mask friends, but friends none the less." _I let out a small sigh at this. _"Listen well, Ducky. No matter what you may think, Shinobi need friends. It's what keeps your sanity held together. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for a few close friends and Hokage-sama."

_Ducky actually looked a bit angry at this._

"Besides," _I continued, _"Wouldn't you want a good friend fighting beside you then alone?"

"I suppose," _Ducky said, crossing his arms. My words seemed to have permeated into him, good. _

_I cleared my throat, interrupting him when he opened his mouth, to ask another questions I assume. _"Now, where was I?"

_----------change: STPOV (Story Telling Point Of Veiw)-----------_

_Ah, yes, training assignment. You see, as I have told you already, Hokage-sama has been training me for two years now, nonstop for each single day of those years. Now, I know, he has that ungodly amount of paperwork, right? You might as well be asking yourself, "How the hell did Hokage-sama get away from all that paperwork?" Two words Ducky, __**Kage Bunshin.**__ Though his reaction, when I voiced my opinion about it, to decrease paper loads, was very.....satisfying and enjoyable. _

_What was Hokage-samas reaction? I'm not going to tell.....don't give me that look, Ducky. Anyway, Hokage-sama brought me during early morning when the sun hasn't even risen and the fog was still out at a training ground to meet up with the Masks. I thought it was a bit cliché meeting the Masks this way._

_I first met Dolphin. He was actually average looking man, though very talented. Despite how he looks, he was the heavy hitter of the group and tactician. You won't believe what kind of tricks he can pull out of his ass._

_Dolphin always bows low to the ground for Hokage-sama when they meet. It's just some quirk he has. Anyway, I already know Inu-baka from....earlier introductions. _

_Such as saving my life several times._

_He was our tacticion Mask and a Quick Hitter, meaning strike fast and get the hell out of there. All that was left was to meet your brother, Pocky Eye._

_-----------change: CFPOV (Comedy Fox's Point Of View)-------------_

_This Dolphin guy is way too strict. Bowing so freaking low......I wonder if he has back problems._

_Before I could dwell on that, a chilling voice was right behind me._

"Hello, Naruto-kun!" _I jumped back and flung a kunai at the only person that could get the jump on me. Inu was once again twirling my thrown kunais with his fingers while reading his....book, for lack of a better word for it. _

"Inu-baka," _I muttered, glaring at him. Hokage-jiji was chuckling at the whole thing._

"Ah, Hokage-sama, how are you today?" _Inu said, still reading his accursed book while ignoring my remark, much to my ire. I heard Dolphin begin to sputter and cough._

"Inu-san! You should show more respect to Hokage-sama!" _Dolphin said, more like demanded, at Inu-baka. _

"I would agree with Dolphine-Low-Bow," _I said, taking satisfaction by hearing Dolphin sputter again. _"But then again who am I to say how a person shows respect, right, Hokage-jiji?"

_My Old Man laughed heartily at my words. Dolphin slumped down a little while Inu-baka let out a perverted giggle, obviously reading something from his book. _

"Where is Weasel?" _Hokage-jiji asked. _

"He had a....oh, never mind, he's here," _Inu said, glancing up from his porn._

_---------------------change: PTPOV------------------_

"Pocky Eye was always one to make dramatic entrances, Ducky," _I said to the star struck Ducky, who was hanging on to my words like it was a life line. _

"Did he say why he was late?" _Ducky asked me. I thought back and scoffed slightly._

"Actually, he did."

_---------------------change: CFPOV------------------_

"Forgive my lateness, Hokage-sama, my brother had a nightmare that required my immediate attention," _Weasel said to Hokage-jiji, going to one knee and bowing his head once he appeared in front of him._

_-------------change: PTPOV-------------------_

_Ducky promptly fell out of the chair at that one! Ha!_

"M-my brother actually said that?!" _Ducky said with a faint blush on his cheeks. Poor kid, must be embarrassed. _"He didn't tell you what my dream was, right?" _he asked nervously._

_Hmm, should I tell him? Nah, same that black mail for later._

_--------------------change: STPOV--------------------_

"Oh? What was your brother's dream?" _Hokage-jiji asked out of, I assume, curiosity. _

_Weasel stood up with a small chuckle. _"Rampaging rabbits eating all his tomatoes."

_It took only three second for me to burst out laughing at the ridiculous dream! Even though I couldn't smile, I couldn't hold back the laughter. _

_Once I was done, Weasel looked at me with the tilt of his head. Inu managed to drop his book in order to stare at me out of shock. Dolphin was shaking his head at the whole thing. _

"Ah, sorry," _I mumbled scratching the tip of my nose, slightly embarrassed at what I did. Hey, it was funny, screw anyone who wouldn't laugh at that!_

_--------------change: STPOV------------------_

_Although I didn't look it, your brother was an intimidating figure, no matter his young age, Ducky. He has this stoic posture that just screamed "come at me and die"! But, what he noticed about me right off the bat, not even a full minute when he was introduced, he saw what many others have failed to see. _

_That I couldn't smile._

**Lvmj: "Note right now that the CFPOV is what Naruto went through and is NOT telling Sasuke this, though you can tell what he did and what he left out when telling Sasuke if you followed closely. Now, onto the Omake. I realized that I said the next 50****th**** reviewer gets an Omake, and the 100****th**** has made a review. I am sad to say I can't except this one, for this person didn't read the full story when reviewed. I will feel like I cheated the others who have read all of the story and reviewed in the latest chapter. SO! The next two reviewers get an Omake, making a total of two Omakes! Remember, the Omake must retain to the story somehow."**

**DarkLvmj: "WOOT! Two OMAKES! Freaking awesome!"**


	19. Interlude: The Evil Cat Tora

**Lvmj: "College is keeping me busy, just something small for you guys and girls."**

_Interlude: The Evil cat Tora_

_Today was a slow fucking day. There is absolutely nothing to do! All missions are done, for my ANBU grouping I am with anyway. The others are for stupid Genin missions._

_Even looking at the clouds isn't doing it for me, last time I listen to a Nara. _

"Fuck it!" _I said aloud, standing up from atop of the Hokage's Tower. This was the highest point to look at clouds so I thought it would be nice.....yeah, right._

_I quickly made my way back down towards my Old Man's office, hoping that the old coot wasn't too busy for his paperwork or whatever he was doing._

_Barging in, I felt something hit the door I just swung open and hit the ground._

"Are you alright, Danzo?" _my Old Man asked the down man. _

"Of course, Hokage-sama,"_ the old buzzard said, looking around to see who...heheh...knocked him down. I in the meantime was already hiding behind the Old Man, satisfied at knocking him down._

"A powerful breeze?" _the Old Man said with a hint of amusement. The Old Buzzard just 'humphed' and walked out, slamming the door._

"Close one," _I said, hoping up and sitting on the desk. _

_My Old Man chuckled, his wrinkly cheeks crinkling. _

"What do I owe the pleasure of this visit, Naruto-kun?" _he asked me._

"I'm bored Jiji, there is nothing to do today!" _I said, my head tilting side to side. _

"I'm sorry to hear that Naruto, but I don't have any missions for your ANBU captain for your team to go on." _I sighed loudly, muttering to myself before glancing down at a file on his desk. _

_Jiji seemed to follow my gaze, even with my Mask on. _

"The Tora file Naruto?" _he said, greatly amused. _"Tora seems to be on a wreck today. No one's been able to catch her." _Unknown to me, he had a knowing glint in his eye. He knew I couldn't turn down a challenge. _

"I'll take it Jiji!" _About time! I took the folder, scanned it quickly, and set it down. _

"Be careful Comedy Fox," _Jiji told me. I gave him a small salute before disappearing from his office._

_--------------------change-----------------------_

_Oh boy, Naruto-kun is going to have some difficulty. Though I wonder how he will handle it, he has never taken on Tora before._

_Pushing those thoughts from my head, I turned around in my seat to stare out the window of my village, Konoha. The Feudal Lord will be here soon with his wife for a visit. Hopefully Naruto-kun will have his wife's cat by then._

_-----------------change-----------------------_

_Looking at the picture I snagged from the file, I saw a ribbon tied on the cat. This shouldn't take long; it's just a fucking cat. Jumping on a rooftop, I looked around for the feline, frowning underneath my Mask. _

"Where the fuck is it?"_ I muttered to myself._

_-------------------Two Hours Later----------------------------_

"Finally!" _I shouted, spying the fucking hell of a cat just sitting right in front of the blasted academy, grooming itself. The second I plated right in front of it, it backed away._

"Come on your damn furball, time to get back to your owner," _I growled out and dove at it. _

_Surprisingly, Tora dodged to the left and bit....my....hand....._

"You fucking cat!"_ I wildly swung my hand side to side to try and dislodge Tora unaware there was a poof behind me._

"Yo Com--," _was all I heard from Kakashi-White Hair as my hand with Tora attached struck him in the head, sending him to the ground. _

"Not now baka-White Hair!" _I yelled as the Cat from Hell let go finally and landed on the ground. _

_The demon spawn hissed at me and took off down the road. _

"Oh hell no!" _Chasing after it, I took out my ninjatos. _"Get back here before I cut off your legs!"

_----------------change--------------_

_Ow, what hit me? Getting back to my feet, I lazily looked at Naruto running after Tora swinging his swords. I sighed at the whole thing._

"I hope he doesn't kill Tora," _I mused. Tora suddenly jumped back and bounced off Naruto's mask, sending him down while jumping to the roof. _"That is one smart cat."

_Chuckling, I strolled over to where Naruto-kun was just getting up. _"Need any help there Comedy Fox?" _I snorted when Naruto flipped me off._

"Screw you Baka-White Hair," _he growled out to me. I simply raised my hands in defense, smiling at him. _

"Do you even have a plan?" _I asked, raising a brow at a him. _

"Yeah, numbers," _he said as he formed a familiar hand sign. _"**Tajuu-Kage-Bunshin no jutsu!**"

_---------------------change--------------------------_

_Stupid little boy! He has no idea what he faces with me, the great Tora! Strolling down the road, I reflect on all the idiots that have tried to catch me and fail. Of course there are some lucky ones, but most of them have failed underneath my awesome skills! _

_Thinking of my greatness, I saw a large shadow pass over me. Looking up, I whimpered. Crap!_

_--------------------change-----------------------------------_

"Get that cat!" _I commanded to my clones with my blades out, snarling at the damn demon that suddenly scampered away. _

_One of my clone tackled the cat but was soon dispelled when the cat bit down on....ouch._

_Clutching the phantom pain in between my legs, I scowled at the cat as it made it's way towards the Forest of Death. _

"Oh it's on now you flee bitten cat! Jiji has a jutsu free zone in the Forest!" _I gleefully shouted as all the clones charged at the forest._

_--------------------------change---------------------------------_

"It's go to see you Hiro-samma," _I said with a small bow to the Fire Feudal Lord. _

"Hiruzen, it's a pleasure to see you as well," _he said with a small chuckle as his wife simply smiled. _

"Please, sit down. You two must be tired from your j--,"_ I was saying before several explosions rocked Konoha. _

"ANBU!" _I called out as several ANBU showed within a second. _"What was that explosion? Are we under attack?"

_I noticed all of them squirm a bit as they were all silent. A small chuckle escaped one of them. _"Well, sir, Naruto-kun is in the Forest of Death," _Tenzo said. _

"And why is he? He was on a mission to....oh," _I muttered and turned to the wife of the Feudal Lord. _"I am sorry to say that your cat is---," _I began once again before the glass shattered behind me._

_----------------------change--------------------_

_The demon cat from Hell managed to run out of the Forest of Death with only me after it. So far it was singed and beaten up, but all there was left was me and one out of all clones. The little fucker got my clones in their own crossfire!_

"Go blown that damn thing up!" _I commanded to my last clone. He nodded and ran right behind it._

"**Bunshin Daibakuha!**" _the clone roared, exploding and sending the demon cat right into the Hokage Tower's window. I followed right in, holding my ninjatos in the air to kill that fucker once and for all!_

_Only to be restrained by a large wooden root and other Masks. _

"Let me kill it! Let me kill that damn mother fucking, rotting son of a bit--," _I continued on until Jiji put a hand over where my mouth would be on the mask, making me stop. _

_I looked on in front of me to see the Land of Fire's Lord with his wife holding a severally scared Tora. _

"Comedy Fox....missions complete, I guess," _Jiji mused. _"ANBU, please escort Naruto-kun away and make sure he doesn't try anything." _Damn it! Jiji knows me too well._

_-----------------change---------------------_

"Hiruzen......I think something's wrong with that ANBU," _the Lord told me, sweat dropping as Naruto was pulled out. _

"I apologize for that, Naruto is rather young and hot headed," _I said. _

"No matter, I fear for his pscological state. Something should be done for him," _he argued._

"What do you have in mind?" _I couldn't help but ask._

"Well, I think he needs to be with his own peers. The Academy is starting up soon again, isn't it?"

_I couldn't help but grimace on how I am going to break the news that Naruto-kun will have to go to the Academy._

**Lvmj: "And that was how Naruto found himself going to the academy in the first place, all because of Tora. Just a small interlude in the story. Sorry I haven't been writing much, college is almost over so hopefully this will tide you over for now."**


	20. Mask Beginnings: The Second Act

**Lvmj: sighs. "We are sorry for the very late update. There have been...complications."**

**DarkLvmj: "Like College, which is OVER, your hand problems, getting hit by a car..." gulps and scoots away from Lvmj's glare. **

**Lvmj: "Yes, I was hit by a car, freaking guy should have looked where he was going, but that happened ages ago. Anyway, yeah, sorry for the late update."**

**DarkLvmj: "At least you didn't go to the hospital...though you did go rather far when you got hit."**

**Lvmj: sighs. "Let's get on with the story. Oh, and from now on, the majority of the 'Mask Beginnings" will be told in**_ CFPOV (Comedy Fox's Point Of View)_**."**

**DarkLvmj: "Before that! Guess who's birthday passed in December!" Nudges head to a glaring Lvmj. "If you do and get the day right, you win an Omake!" **

_Chapter Nineteen: Mask Beginnings_

_The Second Act: Pocky?_

_Recovering from my laugh, I looked at my Old Man. _"So, Jiji, what's going on?" _I asked, raising a brow once I noticed that his mouth was slightly gapped. _"Uh, Jiji, flies are going to make your mouth a new home, you know?"

_That got him to close it with a small snap and chuckle a bit. _"I'm sorry Naruto-kun, you just surprised me." _I simply shrugged and looked back at the other three._

_Inu was picking up his smut, actually cooing at it in an apologetic manner...Inu-baka creeps me out sometimes. Dolphin seemed to be looking at Inu with akin of disgust, though I can't really see his face since he had a Mask. _

_Weasel though was staring intently at me, so much that I actually hid behind Jiji! He didn't have his Mask on yet though, so I recognized him as an Uchiha. Hopefully he isn't a stuck up bastard like the rest, though it's rather hard to tell since he seems to be...devoid of expression._

"Weasel, this is Naruto-kun," _Jiji introduced me and pushed me a little to greet Weasel. _

"Err, hey," _I lamely said. Really, 'hey' was all I can come up with? Before I berated myself any further, a thin stick of some kind was thrust into my face that came from a box._

"Pocky?" _Weasel asked me, already chewing a piece of the candy himself. _

_I blinked and stared at the pocky, actually shocked. This was by far the strangest greeting I have ever had from another person. But it was a welcomed one; certainly beats getting hit from the villagers. _

"Ah, thanks Pocky Eye," _I said, grabbing the stick and popped it into my mouth, chewing softly. _

_Looking back up, I was surprised to see an amused look on Pocky Eye's face. _

"Pocky Eye?" _he asked with a tilt of his head, his face once more switching to expressionless. _

"Oh, uh, I have this thing with nick names," _I said. Pocky Eye just nodded and went to go stand with the other two._

"Aw, Naruto! Why don't I have a nick name?" _Inu asked me, his book tilted to the side so he could look at me. If it wasn't for his Mask, I'd say he was pouting at me!_

"Inu-baka," _was all I said as Inu-baka faltered, making as if I hurt him by grabbing his heart. I just rolled my eyes at what he was doing._

"Hokage-sama, I'm sorry to interject, but what is the mission?" _Dolphin asked, gaining my attention as well as Jiji's. Oh yeah, why was I out here?_

"It is time for Naruto-kun to be immersed into the ways of the ANBU," _Jiji said. My eyes practically bugged out of my head! ANBU?_

"But sir, don't you think he's a bit too young?" _Surprisingly, Inu was the one to say this_.

"Yes, I admit I was questioning myself, but Naruto needs to learn stealth, infiltration, and other certain things ANBU have. I myself would have taught them to him, but as Hokage, I can't leave far from Konoha for this." _That sounds reasonable, though I was a bit upset that Jiji wouldn't be able to teach me those things. _

"I'll look after him," _I heard Pocky Eye say out loud, causing most of us, except Jiji, to jump. I forgot he was even here, sneaky bastard. He even had on his Mask already!_

"Are you sure, Weasel?" _Hokage-jiji said, frowning._

"Yes sir. Besides, I am the stealth expert and infiltrator of this certain group. Who better to watch him then me?" _Pocky Eye said stoically. _"He might as well learn from me a bit of it."

"Very well," _Jiji said before looking at me. _"Now Naruto-kun, I want you to follow Weasel-kun's orders as if they were my own. Understand?" _The tone in his voice left no room to complain, so I quickly nodded my head in agreement._

"Don't worry Jiji, I'll listen," _I said. Jiji just smiled, obviously content with my answer. There was nothing I wouldn't do for the Old man. Hell if he asked for me to jump in circles while tap dancing to 'Oh McDonald' I'd do it!_

_But it would be so freaking embarrassing. _

"Inu, here is your mission," _Jiji said, giving Inu-baka a folder of what mission we are going on. Inu took it and scanned it over._

"Seriously?" _Inu murmured in, from what I can hear, surprise and excitement._

"Yes. This mission is actually a training assignment for Naruto-kun, but there is a side mission for your team as well," _Jiji said seriously. _"I expect to see you all in two weeks."

"Yes Hokage-sama," _the others side while I just gave a _"okay Old man." _Jiji chuckled as he motioned me to follow the others. _

_Pocky Eye was suddenly at my side, a hand placed on my shoulder._

"Come Naruto-kun, we still have to be debriefed from Inu-san," _Pocky Eye told me. I just rolled my eyes and looked at Inu-baka._

"Okay team, seems we are on a scouting mission and to retrieve important documents," _Inu said with a badly concealed giggle. _

_Wait, giggle? No...no, no, no!_

"We are going to the Icha-Icha Convention at Kumo!"

_For the love of Kami, I curse whoever wrote that trash!_

_-change-_

"AAACHOOO!" _I sneezed, all over my notes! Damn it, it took me...killer intent?_

_Looking behind my crouched form, I saw the devil in a woman's skin._

"Have mercy!" _I pleaded before a fist was...then darkness._

**Lvmj: "Yeah, it's a little short, but it's the best I can do right now. DarkLvmj helped me a lot with it, so all thanks to her."**

**DarkLvmj: blushing. "Aww, no problem! Glad to help! Now on to the Omake!"**

**OMAKE!**

**For Filly8 and Munky5 who wanted Sasuke's dream**

The Land of Tomatoes

"Hmm, five more minutes mom," _I said sleepily as the tugging became more constant. The last thing I remember was waiting for 'Tachi to come home. Opening my eyes, I turned to stare at who I thought was mom...only to see the face of a llama._

"Llama?" _Screaming, I backed away from the strange llama and clung to the wall. Is it wearing a jacket? That is the most strangest thing I've ever seen! _

"Sasuke, we are waiting for you," _the llama...spoke...oh Kami._

"W-who's waiting?" _I asked, trying not to show fear. Uchiha don't show fear!_

"Why the Tomatoes of course!" _the strange TALKING llama said to me. Wait, tomatoes? Finally working up the courage, I climbed out of bed and made it around the freakish llama. _

_Taking off in a run, I almost crashed into the back door and opened it. My jaw dropped at the most delicious looking tomatoes I have EVER seen, they are even bigger than me!_

"Welcome Sasuke-sama!" _the Tomatoes cheered out. _"Please, have some!"

_A Tomato hobbled up to me, a freshly sliced small tomato on a place was on its head. _

_Before I could even grab it, the sky suddenly darkened, the wind picked up, blowing violently all around us._

"Sound the alarm!" _someone cried out until the most terrifying beast jumped over my house and squashed the Tomatoes! It was easily bigger then my own house, white fur, long blade like teeth and such floppy ears!_

"NO!" _a tomato screamed before the giant rabbit sunk its EVIL teeth into my precious! Before I could even attack, the Rabbit set its EVIL biddy eyes on me._

_The Rabbit's jaw suddenly seemed to stretch, rows of sharp teeth littered around in its mouth! It's going to eat me! _

_-change-_

_Setting on my armor, I quietly wondered why Hokage-sama was calling this meeting. For some reason, I am actually excited. Strange, I have never really been excited on going on a mission before._

_I wonder if-_

"AHHHHHHHH!"

_Sasuke? Rushing out of my room at blinding speed, I arrived in Sasuke's room holding a toy kunai, waving it wildly._

"Back evil rabbits, back I say!" _Sasuke said. It was tough not to crack a grin so I settled on a small smile while I poked him in the head, waking him up from his nightmare._

"Sasuke-kun, are you alright?" _I asked. _

"'Tachi! It was horrible! Rampaging Rabbits were eating all my Tomatoes!"

_Oh boy, looks like I am going to be late for the meeting. Oh well, at least I will have a story to tell to Sasuke when he gets older._


	21. Mask Beginnings: The Thrid Act

**Lvmj: "Sorry for the long wait. College, once again, mixed with family issues and hand issues put this off for a long time."**

**DarkLvmj: "INDEED! College stuff me to too!" T.T "But glad I could help Lvmj with this!"**

**Lvmj: "Agreed." Sighs. "Happy Thanksgiving to you all, I got some cooking to do."**

**DarkLvmj: "HAPPY THANKSGIVING!" ^-^**

_Chapter Twenty: Mask Beginnings_

_The Third Act: The Mission_

_As we travelled among the tree tops to Kumo, I couldn't help but curse what the Old Man has me doing. Those 'documents' Jiji probably wants retrieved are Icha Icha! Damn it! My first training in ANBU and I have to go and pick up smut! Oh Jiji is so going to have my foot crammed up his wrinkly old a—_

"Naruto-kun, do try to stay calm," _I heard Pocky-Eye's voice beside me. He was sticking close beside me since the other two were up ahead of us. I couldn't go as fast as them yet, they having more experience on me. _

"I'm trying," _I said to him, still grumbling about Jiji. It was then that I saw Inu-baka halt in a clearing. Pockey-Eye and I stopped right behind him as Dolphin was checking out a map._

"While Dolphin figures out where we are, I suppose I should go over what exactly we are doing," _Inu-baka said in such a lazy ass tone. About time! _"The document is actually a scroll from Jiraiya-sama containing secrets. Hokage-sama didn't receive word from him so we are to convene with him at the convention..." _Here is where Inu-baka giggled like a little girl, COMPLTELY destroying whatever seriousness there was in his speech...well, at least it's not all for smut._

"Found it, we just have to make it past this wooded area and head up the mountain," _Dolphin said. Oh yeah, that's right, Kumo is on a fucking mountain...oh this is going to be loads of fun..._

_~~~~~~~~Several Hours Later~~~~~~~_

_Finally, we made it past the woodlands...and now facing a huge ass mountain that was littered with guards. _

"Now listen up everyone," _Inu-baka said in a low whisper. _"Weasel, take Naruto-kun and show him how it's done while I and Dolphin take the other side, agreed?"

_Pockey-Eye nodded his head and took off. I was quick to follow him, mimicking his silent footsteps as the other two shot off in the other direction. _

_He suddenly stopped and slid, ducking underneath a boulder. I did the same, crouching down in front of him._

"You see that guard on our left, Naruto-kun?" _Pockey-Eye said, motioning me to take a look. I did so, peeking my head out, seeing a male guard standing there, looking side to side. _"Guards always have a timed setting in their head to look from side to side, especially if it's a guard who always stands guard. You must take your time and found out how much time he looks from right to left."

_Okay, I understand that bit. Peeking over again, I tried to time how long the guard looks from right to left and so forth. _

_Hmm..._

_Five seconds to the right..._

_About seven seconds to the left..._

_Six seconds to the right? I thought it was...damn, pay attention!_

_Seven seconds..._

_Six seconds..._

_Seven seconds...six seconds!_

"Seven seconds to the left, six seconds to the right," _I whispered to Pockey-Eye before turning back to him...to realize he was already gone...fuck!_

_Quickly turning back to the guard, I see Pockey-Eye calming sitting down on a boulder above the guard, ushering me to hurry with his hand._

_I didn't know whether to be pissed or be in awe at how fast and stealthy he pulled that off. _

_None the less, I was aiming for that as well! Paying attention to the guard, he looked off to the left, time to make my move!_

_I ran off to the side and got closer before ducking down as my seconds were up. Mentally I counted down the seconds before moving again. I made it just barely, sliding under a rock gap since I was small enough, popping on the other side of the guard. _

_Pockey-Eye gave me a silent clap before he pulled me up. He inclined his head to follow as he took off ahead of me. Following him, I couldn't help but think of the teaching experience he put me through. _

_I rolled my eyes, no doubt that Pocky-Eye was enjoying me squirm. _

_All in all, it took us an hour to reach the walls of Kumo. The guards were really pathetic actually, once you learned a trick or two from Pockey-Eye. _

_Both of us found Inu-baka and Dolphin casually leaning against the walls. _

"How did he do?"_ Inu-baka said to Pockey-Eye. Must be about me._

"He was adequate," _Pockey-Eye said to him in a stoic voice. Seriously, this he ever have voice range or anything?_

"Good, now, from this point on, we are not from Konoha, it wouldn't do any good for our village to get in trouble if we fail." _Inu-baka actually made sense on that. I wouldn't want Jiji to get in trouble for my mistakes. Inu-baka then brought out a scroll as he unsealed it, creating smoke around him._

_When it had dissipated, I saw him in a comical mask that was usually sold during festivals and...it had the trade mark Icha Icha on it..._

"Please don't tell me we are wearing those to get in?" _I whispered dangerously, frowning. _

"Yup! But you're a minor, so here's yours," _Inu-baka said, holding out a cattish face on it. At least its better then a damn Icha Icha mask!_

_Putting on my Mask, I looked around at Dolphin, who had a...fish mask...wow. Looking away, I gapped at Pockey-Eyes mask...it was a blank mask with a pocky box on it with one of the sticks out of the box._

_Talk about dedication!_

_Jumping over the gates of Kumo, we all quickly intergrated into the groups._

"Split up, find Jiraiya-sama,"_ Inu-baka commanded. I was about to jump away until Pockey-Eye took my shoulder. _

"Follow me, it's unwise to leave you alone on your first mission,"_ he quietly said to me. I couldn't help but agree with him on that one._

_Damn, and here I was hoping something exciting would happen!_

_-Change-_

"You sure he's here?" _the Raikage asked me. _

"Yes sir," _I said. Oh I know it was him alright! I sent him flying with my fist!_

"Try to find him again, Yugito."

**Lvmj: "Review, please. Need some encouragement in writing the next chapter, its going to hurt, literally." **


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